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How do I keep my patience and stay occupied?


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By now you could have switched careers, applied for citizenship in a different country, moved to that country, and gotten treatment already. 

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Pretty much.

Okay, my mom keeps saying that it’s still better wait times than Canada. Canadians, is that true? I feel like that is not true.

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35 minutes ago, Iceheart said:

Pretty much.

Okay, my mom keeps saying that it’s still better wait times than Canada. Canadians, is that true? I feel like that is not true.

I’m not Canadian, but it’s not true. Pretty much all of the nonsense about Canadian health care being awful was made up by health insurance companies in the US. One of the men who was a big part of it now is fighting against his own lies. American healthcare is horrible.

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I just had the absolute worst PT appointment. 

I've hated this place from the very start. I insisted I go, against my doctor's recommendations, hoping they could get me exercising again. Oh no, I was instructed to walk five minutes a day during the first appointment - which I've been doing - and he doesn't even bother following up on that until today when he was mad at me for not increasing my distance. No other exercise. This guy is all about making small movements to affect the body, which has done, wait for it... nothing. I'm sure you could figure that out.

And then he tells me that I clearly just want to do absolutely nothing for myself and just lay around like a log and hope that surgery will fix it... uh NO, I CAME TO YOU FOR EXERCISE HELP AND YOU GAVE ME NOTHING. 

Also, yeah, actually. I am so burned out on being in pain and having to keep up my work schedule that I am very much looking forward to the extended recovery time of surgery, because at least people will let me rest.

He also kept trying to tell me that the pain wasn't anything to worry about and that I can't do anything to make it worse... when my condition literally worsened rigth in front of him, wen I first started it was only my left leg that was bothering me, now it's both legs.

And then he tried to talk to me about starting a mindfulness meditation practice, and the stuff he said I just couldn't wrap my head around... like, I literally could not figure out what he was talking about. And then he got mad about that, because he was trying to HELP.

I'm seriously so down about this for some reason. I mean, the feeling of dislike is mutual, but this guy made it so much about him and all my shortcomings that I can't shake it.

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That was my last appointment, thankfully.

God, all I want to do today is cry, but I had to go straight to work after the appointment so I have another 2 1/2 hours to wait before I can even do that.

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Better news today from spine doctor #1! Since I respond well to steroids, he's going to try epidural steroid injections. And I get to have the first one on Monday.

If this works, I'll be able to be a lot more active. If it doesn't work, at least I tried!

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Epidural was yesterday!

As far as procedures go it was non-traumatic, but starting about 12 hours in I feel like I have an iron helmet squeezing my head and pushing down on my neck and shoulders. I got about three hours of sleep last night because of it. It's still going strong.

I think people on Facebook think my updates on this are about my second Covid vaccine, so yeah, I get to go through this all again next week. Thankfully the day after my MRI, not before. It would suck laying in an MRI for an hour and a half with Covid symptoms.

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The worst headache I've ever had was after having Noah, and it was because the anesthesiologist nicked my spinal cord when inserting the epidural. I was slowly leaking fluid and the pressure change was excruciating. It leveled out while I was laying down though, so I would feel 1000x better while horizontal. But it's something to be aware of. 

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Yeah, they briefed me on a dural puncture, but my headache got worse when I was laying down, and got better once I finally got about 14 hours of sleep... but of course I then go to work and have to lift heavy boxes and the headache comes back again.

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