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Talked to school psychologist and Special Education teacher yesterday. There is some concern because his current IEP indicates that he should only spend 16% of his time in general education, but that's more a function of how his previous school district does self-contained classrooms. The comment from everyone when they ask how he is academically and I respond that he is at or above grade level and their immediate reaction is oh gosh we need to get him into gen ed asap then. The psychologist does seem to have some doubts that this is the right program for my son, but that he can try it out and see how it goes. Basically, much as they claim you don't need an ASD Dx to be in this program, they prefer you to have one. I explained that his previous program was a pilot program for students with ASD and ADHD and his comment was why would they combine those? Honestly, I think it was really for kids with ASD (and some definitely have ADHD as well) and they included my son at his Kindergarten teacher's insistence that he receive a safer placement than the traditional behavioral program (which, thank God for her). So it sounds like this program he is now in is highly customized to each student so he will be in gen ed as much as he can handle and in this other classroom when he needs a break. His SpEd teacher seems awesome and she wants to actually put him in his 2nd grade classroom as much as possible for the first month because most of it will be about learning rules and classroom behaviors and less focus on academics. But she is going to go get him every 30 minutes for a sensory break back in her classroom and then send him back for another 30 minutes. Fingers crossed for this plan. She is also recommending that my son and my friend's son be in the same classroom together so that they have an instant friend. I think my son will like this a lot because he usually only has 1-2 close friends and isn't much for acquaintances. (But he almost always makes a friend right away.) We get to go visit the school on Monday and meet both teachers and see the classrooms.

I finally got the guts to email his 1st grade teacher to let her know we are moving and that he won't be returning. I asked if we could stop by to say goodbye when we return his Chromebook. I also did a little bit of internet sleuthing and I think I found her baby registry, and she is due in February, which is even earlier than I thought. So it's a good thing we made this move. I am still very sad about leaving his teacher. Maybe I will tell her to look for jobs in this new district.

I also found out that my daughter is getting her 1st grade teacher for 4th grade, which is also good news. She was amazing with my daughter and was so good at finding her supports (and I suspect she is just good at this in general). I also am beginning an ADHD evaluation for her in October, so it will be nice to have a teacher who is familiar with her and that I know and trust. So far she has only had 1 teacher at this school that didn't give me warm fuzzies and that was probably because she was pregnant and grumpy, but her substitute for maternity leave was AMAZING.

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Didn’t really want to make a new topic so I thought I would post this here. After nearly 4 years of hard work, literal blood, sweat and tears, failure and self doubt, finally came the culmination of a

Well, pleased with what I've seen so far. I asked if we could start on the first day instead of waiting for 9/21 when we close. They said yeah sure. I mentioned that I wanted to get in touch with the

It's been good news around here lately. 1. My son's OT informed us that he is actually ready to graduate from his first set of goals that worked on transitions and going along with the group plan

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My oldest kiddo and his wife moved into our neighborhood this month, literally the property we live in, not the same building but just over the street. I’m hoping this means we’re good people, good parents and all that. Rather than it meaning we have accidentally started a cult commune. I must admit I absolutely love that they can just pop over, and that my youngest boys can just pop over there and see their big brother.

I think this might be why they moved so close, to be honest. My oldest is 14 years older than my youngest, so he appears to be doing everything he can to maintain that brotherly bond. He’s such a good dude, I am proud of him. Same said for his wife, who Sara and I feel weird thinking of as an in-law, like in-law feels so formal and bleh. She’s just our newest daughter.

lol All said, I know that not even in a wild fever dream would I ever have considered living across the street from my parents.

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I moved 1,000 miles away in college and then to the west coast (2,000 miles away). My mom noticed. Also 3,000 miles from my MIL. There's a reason. Given how every visit with family goes, I think my decision was a good one.

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Our new place is 25 minutes from my mom, 45 minutes from my dad, and an hour from my MIL. That's just perfect. Close enough to visit whenever we want but far enough away to discourage pop-ins. 

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It's been good news around here lately.

1. My son's OT informed us that he is actually ready to graduate from his first set of goals that worked on transitions and going along with the group plan. She said they are ready to start working on handwriting and other fine motor skills soon.

2. We toured the new school and met his SpEd teacher and his 2nd grade teacher. Both picked up on his strengths and struggles and seem like they can handle it. I liked that his 2nd grade teacher didn't get excited about his wiggles and didn't let him get away with running amok, either. She made sure she explained the safety rules for this sensory seat he wanted to use before he started going crazy with it and using it inappropriately. She got down on his level. She has 4 boys of her own. And she wore a Star Wars mask, so she's automatically cool.

2a. The sensory classroom is fabulous. SpEd teacher is very familiar with sensory needs and uses similar curriculum that he is familiar with (Zones of Regulation).

3. We said goodbye to Ethan's 1st grade teacher today. He handled it really well, too. He did talk her ear off about Terraria and had to sit in her lap pretty much the whole time, but he was ready to go when it was time and didn't throw any fits about leaving her or his school. She is sad but excited for his new sensory classroom. She also gave me her cell phone number to keep in touch. Going to have to hit that Target baby registry for some books.

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School starts Wednesday. My kids are making me nuts. My daughter is surly and has an attitude about everything, and my son won't stop talking about Terraria. Please someone else take them for a few hours, we are all tired of each other after 18 months.

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1 hour ago, Destiny Skywalker said:

School starts Wednesday. My kids are making me nuts. My daughter is surly and has an attitude about everything, and my son won't stop talking about Terraria. Please someone else take them for a few hours, we are all tired of each other after 18 months.

Having a year of everyone being at home was the best thing to happen to my family.

The kids going back to school was the second best. My wife completely homeschooled last year, and it was great, but by the time this school year started, we all needed it.

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It definitely enabled us to do some things that would've been a struggle. Greater focus on therapy for my son because we had a more flexible schedule. Saved a bunch of money on childcare. I think we are going to have to figure out a summer camp solution for my oldest next summer. I'm not sure the little guy will be ready for that environment by then but maybe.

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Oh yeah guys, the secret to being with your kids day in and day out is definitely being able to pawn them off onto others fairly regularly. I've been home with Noah since 2014 and with Luke his entire life. If I weren't able to send them to my grandmother's, mother's, MIL's, sister's, their friend's, camp, etc., I'd have lost my shit a long time ago. I love them dearly, and I'm super grateful that we get to spend so much time together, but sometimes Mom and Dad just need a kid free weekend.

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3 hours ago, Destiny Skywalker said:

School starts Wednesday. My kids are making me nuts. My daughter is surly and has an attitude about everything, and my son won't stop talking about Terraria. Please someone else take them for a few hours, we are all tired of each other after 18 months.

Change Wednesday to Tuesday, and terraria to Mario, and that’s us. Thank fucking GOD for tomorrow 

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3 hours ago, Cerina said:

Oh yeah guys, the secret to being with your kids day in and day out is definitely being able to pawn them off onto others fairly regularly. I've been home with Noah since 2014 and with Luke his entire life. If I weren't able to send them to my grandmother's, mother's, MIL's, sister's, their friend's, camp, etc., I'd have lost my shit a long time ago. I love them dearly, and I'm super grateful that we get to spend so much time together, but sometimes Mom and Dad just need a kid free weekend.

I have never even had 1 night away from my kids. Their grandparents suck.

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Oh God. 

One of the reasons we have for moving to Austin is so that we, my sister, my brother, and my sister-in-law can pass the kids around as needed for sanity. 

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First week of school was a little rough. He's learning routines and day 1 was super extra. Like, can count on one hand the number of days like that he has had in his life. He's nervous and not sleeping well and it's resulting in him acting out.

I think we need to find a way to help with sleep apnea. We suspected it and went to ENT to have his adenoids and tonsils looked at, ENT punted to a sleep study that we had to wait 6 months for and cost thousands, and then we got the results back which determined he did indeed have sleep apnea, cause unknown. Then COVID happened, couldn't get in for a follow up for quite some time, and ENT just shrugged and said tonsils didn't look big. Waste of my time, but that is the large pediatric hospital and they have been tracing a nasty mold problem in their ORs. I need to get a new referral and 2nd opinion. Teacher reports that he is very tired some days and he is sleeping very poorly lately. Just frustrated.

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At least all your kids can go to sleep on their own. Last night I lay by the side of my kids cot to try and get him to sleep. Only I fell asleep at about 7.45 on the floor and woke up at 9.30pm and he was asleep, and my wife was in bed with the flu and assumed I went to play video games, which is what I wanted to do. Lol. 

My son starts nursery in a couple weeks when he turns two. I cant wait for a couple of days. So far the longest we've spent without him is about 8 hours when he went and stayed the night at my mother's. 

I love the guy more than anything on earth but fuck me I feel like I'm going insane sometimes 

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22 minutes ago, Odine said:

I love the guy more than anything on earth but fuck me I feel like I'm going insane sometimes 

The good news is, that part gets easier -- just kidding. Maybe someday?

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I know the grass is always greener and all that but HOLY HELL I would kill for a little sleep issues right about now. 

We found porn in Noah's computer history. Again. 

  1. We completely understand the curiosity and most definitely won't punish for it. However, this isn't like when we were kids. This isn't getting someone's dad's Playboy or Penthouse magazines or trying to watch Skin-emax through cable static. Internet porn is just so much...more. 
  2. We also completely understand the damage that can happen when one views porn too early or too frequently. We know how it impacts healthy sexual relationships and expectations. 
  3. This time it all started with a Google search for "penis". He's too embarrassed to tell us if the initial search was about a legit question or concern he has with his (presumably rapidly changing thanks to puberty) penis or if it was an (unfortunately somewhat sheltered and amateur) attempt to actually find porn. 

How the fuck do we navigate this? 

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On 9/13/2021 at 11:24 AM, Odine said:

At least all your kids can go to sleep on their own. Last night I lay by the side of my kids cot to try and get him to sleep. Only I fell asleep at about 7.45 on the floor and woke up at 9.30pm and he was asleep, and my wife was in bed with the flu and assumed I went to play video games, which is what I wanted to do. Lol. 

 

When my kid was this age he was ruining our weekends and causing disruptions at daycare with his refusal to take naps. His doctor told us if he was getting 10 hours a sleep at night without interruption we could give up on naps.

Changed our life. Daycare was still a bit of a problem, but man. Laying there until he fell asleep, likely falling asleep myself-- I was losing hours of my days.

My kid was actually super energetic and hyper and a little ADHD up until he hit puberty. Now his almost too chill at 16.

4 minutes ago, Cerina said:

I know the grass is always greener and all that but HOLY HELL I would kill for a little sleep issues right about now. 

We found porn in Noah's computer history. Again. 

  1. We completely understand the curiosity and most definitely won't punish for it. However, this isn't like when we were kids. This isn't getting someone's dad's Playboy or Penthouse magazines or trying to watch Skin-emax through cable static. Internet porn is just so much...more. 
  2. We also completely understand the damage that can happen when one views porn too early or too frequently. We know how it impacts healthy sexual relationships and expectations. 
  3. This time it all started with a Google search for "penis". He's too embarrassed to tell us if the initial search was about a legit question or concern he has with his (presumably rapidly changing thanks to puberty) penis or if it was an (unfortunately somewhat sheltered and amateur) attempt to actually find porn. 

How the fuck do we navigate this? 

We let the kid have a phone pretty early on, with my thinking being teaching him to be responsible before he knew he could keep things from us. He also knew we were aware of everything he did on it or any other device. When he was around 10, upon a regular search history inspection, I found the most risqué thing he had looked up to be "girls in bikinis falling down."

Last time I did a check it was suspiciously empty save for lots of gaming mods. He knows I have access and a lot of times he's not around his computer. I like to think he's being responsible, but he also knows how to clear his search history now. Sometimes I do spot checks and he's never paranoid about it.

I have the same porn worries you do-- I don't want him having misconceptions about sex or how he should treat women, but I have luckily seemed to dodge issues for now.

I mean MY search history would destroy a young virgin mind, so....

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There are a lot of ways to block porn. OpenDNS does a good job. It’s not going to stop everything, and there are ways to get around any block, but the dangers of internet porn are real and it might be worth looking into. Along with Trevor talking to him. 

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