Kid stuff

[Cerina]

My heart goes out to you both. That's just so painful to read. 

Mean girl behavior is excused just like "boys will be boys" bullshit. The guilty parties just don't believe that they're doing anything wrong. They feel that they're entitled to be that way. 

[Tank]

Here's an amusing kid update.

O has always loved Pokemon cards. He watched the cartoons briefly, and I don't know if he's ever actually PLAYED the card game itself. I tried to learn the rules and play it with him once, but my ADHD could not fathom the rules and he much preferred the simple,e "war" style game he and his friends made up. He just liked collecting the cards and pretending they were worth money. He's played several of the DS games though.

After he moved out of my place he got all his cards in one place and over the last year has been picking through them. A few months ago he and some friends started hitting swap meets and flea markets for fun. Turns out they do in fact have to "catch them all."

Surprisingly, he's actually got a few cards worth a fair amount from when he was little-- as in a couple $8k cards. He and his friends have a "business" idea to hunt down old cards and resell them. You know-- a completely original, low risk, huge payoff business plan. 

I did my best to gently tell him not to "over invest." His step-dad helpfully told him "any card worth anything is already found and flea market folks check eBay for stuff like that." And his mom offered to give him legit proper business advice, and he has ignored all of us of course.

He just paid $350 to send off his valuable cards to get slabbed and rated. 

Basically it's one of those "spend a bunch of money dreaming of one big payoff that probably will break you even realistically" type business. 

I'm split between telling him to save his money, and just letting him have fun while he still gets to live rent free and spend all his paycheck on himself while it lasts.

[Ms. Spam]

Oh like my comic collecting days. Sad face. 

[Destiny Skywalker]

16 hours ago, Tank said:

Here's an amusing kid update.

O has always loved Pokemon cards. He watched the cartoons briefly, and I don't know if he's ever actually PLAYED the card game itself. I tried to learn the rules and play it with him once, but my ADHD could not fathom the rules and he much preferred the simple,e "war" style game he and his friends made up. He just liked collecting the cards and pretending they were worth money. He's played several of the DS games though.

After he moved out of my place he got all his cards in one place and over the last year has been picking through them. A few months ago he and some friends started hitting swap meets and flea markets for fun. Turns out they do in fact have to "catch them all."

Surprisingly, he's actually got a few cards worth a fair amount from when he was little-- as in a couple $8k cards. He and his friends have a "business" idea to hunt down old cards and resell them. You know-- a completely original, low risk, huge payoff business plan. 

I did my best to gently tell him not to "over invest." His step-dad helpfully told him "any card worth anything is already found and flea market folks check eBay for stuff like that." And his mom offered to give him legit proper business advice, and he has ignored all of us of course.

He just paid $350 to send off his valuable cards to get slabbed and rated. 

Basically it's one of those "spend a bunch of money dreaming of one big payoff that probably will break you even realistically" type business. 

I'm split between telling him to save his money, and just letting him have fun while he still gets to live rent free and spend all his paycheck on himself while it lasts.

Is this kind of like my Boomer pare ts hanging onto to all my old toys because they might be worth something someday, and missing out on the actual Beanie Baby craze?

[Darth Krawlie]

Man I collect toys from our childhood and let me tell you, for the right collector, that shit can be worth A LOT 

[Ms. Spam]

Finding that right collector is murder. I sold my comic book collection for $250 dollars because I got tired of moving 9 long boxes of Amazing Spider Man and X-Men and rando Image house comics. That was over 20 years of comics.

[Destiny Skywalker]

Q got into one of the private schools for next year. That's a relief. It's a really small school (22 kids max per grade/class) so I hope that's the right fit.

[Destiny Skywalker]

Woooooo, bullet dodged. Our school board tonight miraculously voted to not move 6th grade into middle school. This is such a relief to me. E has made so much progress but there's still so much ground to cover. It is my hope that he will not need paraeducator support in middle school. If we don't have to worry until 7th, I think that might be achievable.

If Q does well at the new school, they sounded open to accepting E if he no longer needs the writing support. I think that small environment would be much better for him, as well. When I brought it up, they said they had a few kids with ASD and they seem like they offer more 504/IEP support than other private schools in our area. I think if Q does well, we will have a good idea of whether they will be able to support E.

[Hobbes]

11 hours ago, Destiny Skywalker said:

Woooooo, bullet dodged. Our school board tonight miraculously voted to not move 6th grade into middle school. This is such a relief to me. E has made so much progress but there's still so much ground to cover. It is my hope that he will not need paraeducator support in middle school. If we don't have to worry until 7th, I think that might be achievable.

If Q does well at the new school, they sounded open to accepting E if he no longer needs the writing support. I think that small environment would be much better for him, as well. When I brought it up, they said they had a few kids with ASD and they seem like they offer more 504/IEP support than other private schools in our area. I think if Q does well, we will have a good idea of whether they will be able to support E.

That is awesome.

If I were to redesign schools, I would have K-6 (divided into K-3 and 4-6), 7-9, and 9-12. 

[Destiny Skywalker]

My BFF lives in Louisiana, they apparently split things up like you propose. Middle school is 4-6, junior high is 7-8. I think they might even do K-1 and 2-3 separately. I really liked E's K-2 school. (Well, really they also did ECEAP for the north end of the district, too, which is the more rural part.) They have a 3-6 school as well, but those are the only 2 in the district that aren't K-6.

I'm going to admit to being shocked that they changed their recommendation. I assumed it was a done deal when they announced it. But the uproar was huge. Most parents were opposed and loudly so. Apparently a lot of our middle school bus routes also pick up the high schoolers too, so that was a concern to be exposing 6th graders to high school bus antics.

Q's school is a mess. The kids are out of control and it stresses her out. Today the boys were squishing bananas and smearing them everywhere at lunch, and the principal had to come talk to the class after lunch because they refused to stop when the assistant principal showed up. The other stories she tells me too, it's like an asylum.

[Jacen123]

My son’s been very fussy most of the week.  He already got his canines in on one side and it looked like the other side was coming out too, which made some sense with all the fussiness.  But then towards the middle of the week, he stopped wanting to eat or drink anything, too.  On Thursday, we started hydrating with medicine droppers which helped some and he started seeming better yesterday morning.  Then he got worse in the e ending again. 

Because of this, we took him to urgent care this morning to see if anything else was up.  They saw that he has an ear infection and then also tested him for strep and Covid.  Even though he had Covid only 6 weeks ago, he tested positive for it again! It’s his third time with it this year.

Fortunately, he seems better already since this morning and is starting to willingly eat and drink more, but just doesn’t want to use any silly cups or straws right now.

What a horrible trifecta of teething, Covid, and ear infection.

 

[Destiny Skywalker]

Poor dude! I hope he is better soon.

[Jacen123]

Thanks! He is asking for more food and drinks today so far this morning.  Hopefully this keeps up and he gets back to his normal self soon

[Hobbes]

About a month ago a 7th grader was caught masturbating in the bathroom by other students.  To my absolute shock, no one really made fun of him for it (we have some pretty decent middle students).  I had to have a very awkward conversation with him and with his mom.  This morning, he was caught again, this time by his younger brother (6th grade) and he started making fun of him non-stop. 

I just got chewed out by the mom because I am letting  another student (his brother) make fun of him for masturbating AND she was mad at me for making the younger brother miss recess for making fun of his brother and not the other kids that were making fun of him the brother told his mom he was the only one that got in trouble...but there were no other kids making fun of him).

[Destiny Skywalker]

Is she going to continue to rail about this or will it be a one time chew out? (Guess it depends on if he gets caught again.)

We just got done with spring break, Q seemed relaxed. And then I got a call from the principal. One of the mean girls filed another bullying report. I'm considering legal action because the accusations are now stooping to defamation, and they certainly seem to be retaliation. I wrote to the deputy superintendent and the school board (her therapist recommended looping them in because of how this has been handled so far). If they find her guilty this time I am homeschooling her until the end of the year. 

[Hobbes]

14 hours ago, Destiny Skywalker said:

Is she going to continue to rail about this or will it be a one time chew out? (Guess it depends on if he gets caught again.)

We just got done with spring break, Q seemed relaxed. And then I got a call from the principal. One of the mean girls filed another bullying report. I'm considering legal action because the accusations are now stooping to defamation, and they certainly seem to be retaliation. I wrote to the deputy superintendent and the school board (her therapist recommended looping them in because of how this has been handled so far). If they find her guilty this time I am homeschooling her until the end of the year. 

She has her own set of issues.

What legal action are you considering? 

[Destiny Skywalker]

I don't know, suing for emotional distress caused by bullying and the school and district continuing to sweep it under the rug? All these therapy bills I have to pay, the time off from work, private school tuition? This is ruining her life, and her therapist is really concerned that this long-term stress is going to be life-altering. Like, she will literally need therapy forever, and probably has PTSD or some long-standing trauma. A friend recommended a lawyer who helped them force their district to allow their son, who is on an IEP, to test for their gifted program. 

I got a thank you for bringing your concerns to light reply from the superintendent. Who I didn't email. He said he is going to meet with the principal. So hopefully someone is paying attention now and I don't have to lawyer up. But this needs to stop.

[Cerina]

Assuming you can afford it, lawyer up anyway. It's not going to stop. They're being absolutely fucking ridiculous at this point. Is her therapist willing to testify to her overall stress level and emotional state? 

I would also yank her out and homeschool anyway. But I know it's not as easy as it sounds since you both work full time and all. 

But seriously, fuck these people. 

[Destiny Skywalker]

She insists she wants to finish the year out because she loves her teacher. Of all the things to be resilient about. I am so glad that we will never have to set foot in this horrible school again.

I was hoping to hear back from the superintendent, but it appears to have just been lip service.

Q was found to not be bullying because of the ridiculous criteria. It's clear they don't believe her side of the story but couldnt find any additional witnesses, and they've created a separation plan for the girls. Q went to the principal and asked why they didn't put a separation plan in place earlier when she had complained. It's clear they are protecting the other girl more than Q. I think it is because the mom is on the PTO and has 3 more kids at the school, while we are done in 9 weeks and they never have to see her again. The principal denied it, but I'm proud of her for advocating for herself.

When I was finally told the official complaint by the principal, I told her that even if it was true, it's definitely not bullying. Apparently the girl claims that Q walked up to her, and said, "Hey, do you know what rape is?" and the girl said no. Q then told the girl that it's when someone forces themselves on you, and the girl told her she needed space, and then Q yelled, "Why are you bullying me?" I can tell you in no universe did this ridiculous conversation take place because it doesn't even make sense. It's so bad it sounds like AI wrote it, or it's just a terrible attempt at a 12-year old lie and I absolutely cannot fathom why anyone even thinks this conversation was real. I'm told it is inappropriate to say "rape" at school at all. In all honesty, I could believe that part of the conversation happened if someone made an inappropriate comment about rape and Professor Q decided to bust out the dictionary definition, but Q insists the word rape was never said to this girl or anyone else. I also told the principal off because she tried to claim the girls were friends again. (Q told me she had hoped for it to be true, but its clear now it wasn't.) I told her that these girls were never her friends and that was a narrative the staff was pushing because they couldn't see through their behavior and wanted everything to be fine. The principal is tired of my shit because I keep calling them on their nonsense.

What Q did later admit to me, was she got 69 as an answer in math, pointed to it on her paper to the girl  and laughed. That's some realistic 12-year old stuff.

I suspect what actually happened is that the girl made an inappropriate comment at home and Q was her scapegoat. I forgot to tell you a month or so ago, the control freak mom who called Q a bad influence called up the other girl's mom (the one making the latest claims) and told her that HER daughter was a bad influence. The girls are still hanging out at school but the other girl was upset about it. This girl is the perfect example of pretends to be an angel in public but behind closed doors she is always instigating weird or sexual comments and seeing what she can get away with. Have fun with that one, mom. I'd rather have the kid with no filter who I can have open and honest conversations with.