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I just got an email saying that due to an issue with construction (they are building a new middle school wing) they had to move the board meeting back a week. It totally makes sense, but but the lack of communication is frustrating.

 

In K-12 hiring, there are two key things...there is definite hiring window when there are a lot of similar jobs posted. Second, there is an extreme teacher shortage and even fewer high quality applicants. I have had a middle school math opening posted for a month and havent had a single quality applicant. I had a middle school science opening and even marginal applicants were being snatched up between when I schedule an interview and an actual interview.

 

Principal and executive director position do take longer, but they are still only about a month from posting to hiring because the best candidates are also looking at the exact same time. Taking months is almost unheard of.

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We are looking for a new superintendent that will shadow under our current superintendent next year before she retires. I was told that the K-2 principals and 3-5 principals were told no almost immediately, that they were not the right candidates. I wonder what happened in the current environment.

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That's why I switched to math instead of history to teach. I can get a job anywhere with my qualifications as a math teacher. If I was looking around for a history teaching position they'd want me to do "extra" things like coach a girls team. The expectation is weird. Every time I interviewed for a history position I felt like they were looking for a male teacher and someone who could coach a sport.

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We are looking for a new superintendent that will shadow under our current superintendent next year before she retires. I was told that the K-2 principals and 3-5 principals were told no almost immediately, that they were not the right candidates. I wonder what happened in the current environment.

They could want someone whom is: outside the district, has been an area superintendent (someone who oversees a group of schools), from a legal or business background and hire a strong chief academic officer, or they just didn't like the people that applied.

 

Either way, when hiring a highly public leadership role like a principal or superintendent, gossip is so toxic I wouldn't believe much. These positions get hundreds, sometimes thousands, of applicants so that's a lot of no's. The only people that really know are board members and those initial screenings are not public.

 

That's why I switched to math instead of history to teach. I can get a job anywhere with my qualifications as a math teacher. If I was looking around for a history teaching position they'd want me to do "extra" things like coach a girls team. The expectation is weird. Every time I interviewed for a history position I felt like they were looking for a male teacher and someone who could coach a sport.

In my opinion, hiring a history teacher usually provides you with the absolute best opportunity to hire someone with exceptional pedagogy due to the quantity of candidates. I had like 50 candidates apply for the history opening last year.

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Exactly why I switched to math. I could pick my school district instead of my school district picking me. I work inner city schools in a charter attached to my school district and like it better. It's kinda of funny. It's like how nurses in lower income area hospitals like the people they help because they are appreciative patients. Not like in a high dollar area where richer people go where they're very "entitled" and expectations of the nursing staff. My parents work super hard but the value education and are less "helicopter-ey". I also get free tamales every Christmas.

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We are looking for a new superintendent that will shadow under our current superintendent next year before she retires. I was told that the K-2 principals and 3-5 principals were told no almost immediately, that they were not the right candidates. I wonder what happened in the current environment.

They could want someone whom is: outside the district, has been an area superintendent (someone who oversees a group of schools), from a legal or business background and hire a strong chief academic officer, or they just didn't like the people that applied.

 

Either way, when hiring a highly public leadership role like a principal or superintendent, gossip is so toxic I wouldn't believe much. These positions get hundreds, sometimes thousands, of applicants so that's a lot of no's. The only people that really know are board members and those initial screenings are not public.

I have a feeling they are chasing a specific candidate or just really want an outsider so as to not play favorites. The gossip I heard was not necessarily toxic, just that it wouldn't be either of those 2 people and that it was already known. I'm not very high up on the social ladder at either of my kids' schools but my daughter's school is pretty tight-knit despite being rather large. I'm just wondering how the current environment has thrown that search for a loop, given how difficult yours has become with the pandemic. I suspect it wouldn't have been quite as dragged out. I wonder if our search has also been dragged out.
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Stream of consciousness rant for you to ignore.

 

Lyra's homeschooling has become a nightmare. She's at least a week behind and loses her goddamn mind at even the suggestion of doing any work. It's worst with Katie--just being in her physical presence when there's any work to be done and Lyra's brain is just on another planet. She invents cruel and nasty things she believes whole heartedly that Katie says, which are of course complete fabrications. She throws things around the room, breaks her own shit, breaks her brother's shit, says absolutely hateful things to us. By the time she calms down, which can be hours later, she has very little recollection of any of it. It's ****ing awful. All four of us have anger management issues, but hers are the worst I've seen. She knows exactly how to push all of us, and there's only so much patience I can have when I'm also trying to distract her brother and do my own work and calm her down. I'm pretty ****ing tired of bringing her back up, too--telling her how great and smart and capable she is. Shouldn't have to ****ing say it three times a day, every day. It's just worn me down so much.

 

Sorry. Carry on.

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Stream of consciousness rant for you to ignore.

 

Lyra's homeschooling has become a nightmare. She's at least a week behind and loses her goddamn mind at even the suggestion of doing any work. It's worst with Katie--just being in her physical presence when there's any work to be done and Lyra's brain is just on another planet. She invents cruel and nasty things she believes whole heartedly that Katie says, which are of course complete fabrications. She throws things around the room, breaks her own ****, breaks her brother's ****, says absolutely hateful things to us. By the time she calms down, which can be hours later, she has very little recollection of any of it. It's ****ing awful. All four of us have anger management issues, but hers are the worst I've seen. She knows exactly how to push all of us, and there's only so much patience I can have when I'm also trying to distract her brother and do my own work and calm her down. I'm pretty ****ing tired of bringing her back up, too--telling her how great and smart and capable she is. Shouldn't have to ****ing say it three times a day, every day. It's just worn me down so much.

 

Sorry. Carry on.

There's nothing harder than seeing our own neuroses manifesting in our kids.

That really sucks... I am sorry man.

 

Today I had a message from a social worker from the local hospital...a first grade student died a few days ago by choking on an apple. It is the first time I ever handled a student's death. I have supported with deaths in other schools, but those were high school students. I am not saying that makes it any easier, but classmates understand a bit more. When I woke up this morning and drove to work for the first time in months did I think I would spend all day working on a communication plan for a dead 1st grader.

 

This week teacher's are packing up student's belongings and putting them in garbage bags for parents to pick-up. I am not giving her mom (single mom...no other kids) her dead daughter's stuff in a ****ing garbage bag.

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We had a few kids in the grade above us pass away when I was growing up. It was heartbreaking, and I wasnt even close to any of the kids. Thank you for thinking of the mom and not giving her child's belongings to her in a garbage bag. Even a box is better.

 

Jacob, shit is kind of coming off the rails here. My daughter is a lot surlier lately, I can tell this is getting to her. We see a therapist right now for her anxiety, and I'm so glad we started this right before shit got real. It has been a real help to have someone who can guide us and help her with breaking some negative thinking patterns. (Also helped us figure out that losing the dog and my mom and now great-grandma over the last 3 years has really impacted her more than we thought. I think the puppy is going to help a little bit because honestly, out of those 3 that's who she misses the most AND got the least closure.) Could you reach out to Lyra's pediatrician and ask for a psychology referral? That's how we found this psychologist.

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It will be interesting to read childrens psyche journal material a few years later to see how the pandemic affected kids and growth. I am getting a lot of push back right now from students and parents who are just tired of it all. Home with the same group of people, nothing to break it up or change by. But the school is pushing now to see if we can get all the work turned in and graduate a class by mid June.

 

All my kids parents have picked up their kids belongings a few weeks ago when the decision was made to close school for the rest of the year by the governor. But honestly they started asking for it when school started at home so they could have supplies so I've been to school a few times to box up kids stuff since March or when I stopped by to do a social distancing teaching lesson (I would sit outside with my own folding chair and they would stay by the door or a window and I'd talk them through how to get setup up an ID and password to log in and do work, explain to parents how this would work and check on the kids occasionally) so I just have one more desk left to pack up. Mine.

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Our schools have refused to let anyone come pick up any supplies. My son's school was pretty good about sending his extra clothes, boots, etc home that last day. Ai think they knew we weren't coming back. My daughter's school thought we would be back in no time. A few weeks ago her grade put all their workbooks in paper bags and set them outside for us. It sounds like our grade in particular had a lot of complaints about having to re-invent worksheets and materials and the teachers decided screw it, we will teach to the workbooks. (Honestly, not sad, it was a good decision.) They've finally told us that they will organize a pick up time to clean out student lockers, pick up yearbooks, etc the week after school lets out. I think my son's school district has planned for the last week of school to purely handle school supplies, yearbooks, library book returns and Chromebook returns. I really wish they would let those kids that needed one keep their Chromebooks over the summer. I didn't get one for my son because we bought one for my daughter, but if they were letting them keep them over the summer I might have asked for one. Some days when they have to share it's not easy (obviously).

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  • 4 weeks later...

It's totally okay to think/feel/say that your kid is a dick. I think more parents need to be okay with that. Sometimes, kids are DICKS.

 

I am so happy that this never had that happen with us. All of us, me, the former Mrs. Tank, her husband, and my now departed potentially second Mrs. Tank were waiting for the I HATE YOU or the YOU'RE NOT MY REAL MOMs to come flying. They haven't ,because my kid is very good natured and chill.

 

My problem is he is TOO chill. He's empathetic, warm, and funny-- but he could care less about the bigger world and doesn't have much ambition to do anything. Maybe that's okay at 15? I don't know. When I was 15 I was already writing and reading a ton and into girls... my kid's life is 90% video games. We've taken them away when it;'s effected his grades, we've made him do summer camps, and he HAS friend who he hangs out with... but when they hang out, they play video games together.

 

I am just hoping that this is his version of me spending 90% of my childhood (despite having interests and goals) watching TV and movies, and that worked out for me. He did build his own tower PC for gaming, so that's an actual skill.

 

I just don't want him to become a Game Slug Bro.

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It's totally okay to think/feel/say that your kid is a dick. I think more parents need to be okay with that. Sometimes, kids are DICKS.

 

I am so happy that this never had that happen with us. All of us, me, the former Mrs. Tank, her husband, and my now departed potentially second Mrs. Tank were waiting for the I HATE YOU or the YOU'RE NOT MY REAL MOMs to come flying. They haven't ,because my kid is very good natured and chill.

 

My problem is he is TOO chill. He's empathetic, warm, and funny-- but he could care less about the bigger world and doesn't have much ambition to do anything. Maybe that's okay at 15? I don't know. When I was 15 I was already writing and reading a ton and into girls... my kid's life is 90% video games. We've taken them away when it;'s effected his grades, we've made him do summer camps, and he HAS friend who he hangs out with... but when they hang out, they play video games together.

 

I am just hoping that this is his version of me spending 90% of my childhood (despite having interests and goals) watching TV and movies, and that worked out for me. He did build his own tower PC for gaming, so that's an actual skill.

 

I just don't want him to become a Game Slug Bro.

I got my first, "I hate you" last night from my three-year-old because I put him in time out for slapping his brother.

 

Not gonna lie, it hurt...a lot.

 

Our next door neighbor is our nanny and she brings her 6-year-old daughter. The kids love each other and overall they get a long great, but she is SO mean to my boys at times and the oldest is picking up a lot from her, including "I hate you". If he doesn't do something she wants him to do, she threatens she won't be his friend anymore...

 

I got George Castanza'ed by her a few weeks ago. She quit because my three-year-old hit her six-year-old...never mind that she was awful to him all morning. On her last day she asks about her schedule for the next week and said she changed her mind. Professional me would have given her the old HR speech, "the position has already been posted but you are more than welcome to apply for the job" but she is our next door neighbor, we like them personally, and obviously our kids are friends so it's like navigating a minefield.

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Yeah that is rough because you're neighbors. Also, most 6-year old girls are ***holes and play that relational bullying shit. Kindergarten was my hardest year being a Girl Scout leader because of shit like that. I moved troops and most of it went away, thankfully. Doesn't mean it doesn't happen at school, but at least I'm not the one having to manage it, and my kid doesn't do it (sometimes have to deal with her being the victim, though).

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Methinks you pooped too close to your watering hole... but I totally get the convenience factor of her being right there

Yeah...it wasn't so bad when it was just her watching the boys.

 

Yeah that is rough because you're neighbors. Also, most 6-year old girls are ***holes and play that relational bullying ****. Kindergarten was my hardest year being a Girl Scout leader because of **** like that. I moved troops and most of it went away, thankfully. Doesn't mean it doesn't happen at school, but at least I'm not the one having to manage it, and my kid doesn't do it (sometimes have to deal with her being the victim, though).

I agree. Girl bullying and drama is BY FAR the hardest behavior for me to deal with professionally. I would say it peaks in middle school because of social media. I don't know about your experience, but this is one behavior where the apple definitely doesn't fall far from the tree. This is the one behavior where calling the parents makes the situation worse more often than not.

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I made my husband give my 12 year-old a showering lesson the other night. The kid legit smelled like moldy corn chips. I'm pretty sure he hasn't been washing his crotchal area well. Now I'm just like...dear god, has that kid not actually been like CLEAN clean since the last time one of us bathed him...when he was like 4...omg? Husband said the kid was genuinely surprised when shown that soap lathers. :no:

 

This tween thing is killing me. I swear we were good parents until he turned 11.

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