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Accepting charity


12 replies to this topic

#1
Brando

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I've been on disability since February, and things are tight. We're paying for Catholic school for two kids, and my disability is just 65% of my salary. Fortunately my employer picks up the insurance, and my mom has helped out a lot financially, so we aren't struggling to pay the bills but we don't have much extra money.

Someone from our church contacted us to see if we wanted to be on the giving tree this year. People ask for gifts, they put them on little pieces of paper and hang them on trees and people pull them off and buy the gifts.

I'm in favor of it, but my wife is very anxious that people will find out and judge her. People already know that I'm sick and on disability, so it isn't a huge surprise, and the woman swears it's confidential and only she knows who the gifts go to. Every year we buy gifts for people, and this is the one time where we could use the help.

I'm in favor of getting a couple of gifts for the kids and not asking for ourselves. I'm sure we can find a way to provide gifts for the kids but I'm not sure how we can do a full Christmas, even not buying for each other. On the other hand, my mom has said she'll help, but that's a lot to ask of her, even if she does have a decent amount of income with a sizeable amount from the VA and not subject to taxes.

What would you do?

#2
Iceheart

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I say do it. If youve given for years and this year you could use the hand you have given others, why not accept some reciprocation?

#3
zambingo

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Accept all charity and aid offered, always. Pride is totally understandable, but it is also dumb and destructive. This goes for any aid you might be entitled to via other agencies and or the government as well. If you qualify, get it... its there to be gotten, thats its purpose.
  • Rock and Odine +1 this

#4
Rock

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I applied for Unemployment when I was wrongfully fired from my last job.  I've been paying taxes since I was 18, paying into the system.  I have zero problem getting federal help when I need it.



#5
The Choc

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I applied for Unemployment when I was wrongfully fired from my last job.  I've been paying taxes since I was 18, paying into the system.  I have zero problem getting federal help when I need it.

Yeah, zero wrong with this. It's called unemployment insurance and you are forced to pay it every paycheck while you work. It's your money. 



#6
Destiny Skywalker

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I know some people really struggle with accepting help, especially when they've been generous in the past. It sounds like you have a wonderful church that cares about its members and realizes you guys have really been through the wringer lately. I would take it so that it's not a stress, but that's easy for me to say. You can always return the favor when you are back on your feet.

#7
Good God a Bear

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I say do it as well. I know it's easier to give help than accept it so easier said than done. 



#8
Iceheart

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I applied for Unemployment when I was wrongfully fired from my last job.  I've been paying taxes since I was 18, paying into the system.  I have zero problem getting federal help when I need it.

Yeah, zero wrong with this. It's called unemployment insurance and you are forced to pay it every paycheck while you work. It's your money. 

Right? Ive been on unemployment twice. It blows my mind when people think its charity or welfare. I cant help that the company eliminated my position and I have bills to pay. Not to mention the whole thats why Unemployment Insurance exists thing.

#9
Brando

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I’ve only ever heard that from crazy conservatives who think anything involving the government is inherently evil.



#10
The Choc

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I’ve only ever heard that from crazy conservatives who think anything involving the government is inherently evil.

The argument of whether unemployment insurance as something the government forces you to pay is right and whether once you are forced to pay it to cash in that insurance are two different things. 


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#11
Brando

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Yeah, I'm talking people disparaging people who are getting benefits, because they're mooching off the government and the government is evil and therefore people receiving government benefits are evil.

I'm not saying all conservatives are crazy, just that I've only heard it from the crazy ones.

#12
Rock

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I kinda derailed the topic.  Brando:  You should definitely accept the help.  You would, and apparently have, be the first in line to help others in your state.  You're a good dude and good people look out for one another. 



#13
Ms. Spam

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We do the angel tree every year at my Church. It's given from the heart and you should do it.  I would rather spend it on you than my family anyways! I spend a lot of time selecting something that they want and will last from their lists that are provided for us to buy the gifts for the angel tree. Last year I got a 16 year olds list and he just wanted headphones. I shopped and got really good quality noise canceling headphones within the price that was set by the group that handled it in my area.

 

Personally, I've never claimed unemployment but much like Social Security and Medicare taxes taken from my check this is something I pay into. People - that is wackos who belittle people who use WIC, SNAP and other benefits like section 8 housing programs - need to be quiet. They're using benefits every time they drive the roads, expect a policeman to show up to help, want roadside service (some states provide this at no charge) or want a fireman to put out a fire but want to rail about homeless people and cut benefits for food or rent assistance but don't understand these programs are there to prevent these people from being outside living in tents and begging for change marring their perfect little neighborhoods. 





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