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They've all been cool. I have a grand to maintain.   We had date two last night, which continued until breakfast, so I got that going for me.

About 18 years ago, when I was graduating from grad school, some friends at a party went around jokingly asking when we thought we'd peak. I think Napolean Dynamite had recently come out and we were a

I've been a customer service manager the past 10+ years and I got burnt the **** out. I couldn't do it any longer so I made a career change. I'm an account executive for a company booking kid school

At my weekly tabletop gaming group, a friend on another table was explaining where his StarViper model was from and the guy he was explaining it to had no idea what Shadows of the Empire was. It made both of us feel very old.

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I get vexed over it too, and I'm only eight days older than you.

Apart from being freaked out by things from my childhood / 20s being multiples of 5 years old, like the recent 25th anniversary of the end of ST:TNG, it's having a body that isn't invulnerable any more.

Going to see a physiotherapist for the first time in my life next week to develop an exercise / strengthening plan for a shoulder injury that didn't heal fully.

Having to be mindful about how I do kayaking etc. (no more sprinting or surfing for now) instead of never having to worry about injury is really annoying.

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About 18 years ago, when I was graduating from grad school, some friends at a party went around jokingly asking when we thought we'd peak. I think Napolean Dynamite had recently come out and we were all thinking of Uncle Rico, who peaked in High school.

 

We were all in our early to mid 20s, and everyone said something between 28-35.

 

I said 45.

 

I had literally just started to leave my awkward phase at 27. I had always been the most responsible and most mature of any circle I had been in. The stuff I wanted out of life was not going to be easy. For who knows how many reasons, I said 45. I always felt like I was meant to be middle aged.

 

WELL HERE I AM.

 

I turn 45 at the end of this year and I am actually getting everything I wanted back then. I have the career I want, and it';s leveling up exactly how I want it to. I have money. I'm not in debt. I even have savings. I have a family. I have a kid that no longer needs me for everything. I've only in the last few years learned after an entire life of claiming to be introverted and insecure, that really, I just don't like parties. I have no problem being confident, or speaking up.

 

One of the staff writers on my show called my a good leader the other day and I was kinda mind blown. (I am technically our room's Riker, so when the Captain beams down I am in charge).

 

I either have, or am on the cusp of, getting what I have wanted out of life thus far.

 

That said, my body is 100% betraying me. I still look a good decade younger than I am, and I have all my hair. But, my left eye has floaters, my knees are total bull****, and if I do not eat properly and work out 5 days a week I will balloon up SO fast it is infuriating. After a decade of being told to do it, I am finally having my sinuses operated on and my septum corrected. I am hoping that this changes my life in terms of sleep and exercise. I am a little more fixated on my looks and health than I probably should be... but that's what you get when you live in LA and work with pretty actors all day who live on broccoli and cigarettes.

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Are you able to get help? You have a lot on your plate, which will wear anyone down, but the amount you're down seems like more than you should be trying to handle on your own.

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That's one of the hardest parts, going from wanting to doing.

 

We're here to support you, though, and we all want to see you succeed. Make a call on Monday. Just one. See if it works out. A list can be overwhelming, but just one call is something you can do.

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I actually don't FEEL that old. I'm 37 and fitter than I was at 25, faster and stronger. That said, my endurance might be starting to suffer a bit, but that might be stress from everything going on with my kids. My husband is constantly bitching about his back and legs and knees. He really only works out once a week, though, so I tell him it's his fault. The reality is that he's going to be a wreck by the time he's 50. His mom destroyed her kidneys popping ibuprofen like candy, so we will see what we can do for him.

 

At work, I am actually pretty senior for my age, but I'm starting to get annoyed at all the youngins getting opportunities that I would've killed for, but were hogged by all the Baby Boomers who refused to share work or mentor anyone, and finally are starting to retire. I feel like my "generation" got screwed for sticking it out. I do try to help out and mentor even though I'm a little bitter, because I do genuinely enjoy teaching and helping others.

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Likewise, I'm 35 and fitter, stronger and healthier than I was at 25. I train 3 or 4 times a week. Though for the last 2 weeks I haven't been to the gym cause I got sick and we are having our accounts scrutinized by bank people cause we are applying for a mortgage.

 

The only thing I can't do like I used to is drink. That shit takes practice and training. And I'd rather put my time in at the gym than the pub. 2 or 3 pints of guinness now and I'm pleasantly toasted. Any more and I could pass out.

 

Was gonna say more but I deleted it. So Ahh yeah

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That's one of the hardest parts, going from wanting to doing.

 

We're here to support you, though, and we all want to see you succeed. Make a call on Monday. Just one. See if it works out. A list can be overwhelming, but just one call is something you can do.

We are here for you. I am not a doctor or anything but I don't mind answering PMs and stuff. Sometimes it is not about the getting help but finally having someone who listens to all your grievances and sadness and anger to as a kind of way to unburden the weight we carry. I talk to my cats all the time. I also want to strangle all my cats all the time. HAHAHAHA!

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I am having skin cancer removed but I think a lot of stuff for me is just stress. I need to do an actual vacation where I do nothing for about a week but where is that money and time going to come from?

 

My sister recently started a drug habit so we can't give her money as she'll spend it on drugs instead of the stuff she needs it on. So this year for summer vacation I'm going to Tucson for about two weeks with all four cats and driving Tina to get her eyes looked at and new glasses because she doesn't have insurance for that but if we give her cash she'll buy drugs. The rest of the time I'm going to take care of my Grandma so I can keep her desire to die in her own home instead of a assisted living facility because my Aunt won't take care of her and wants to go to Cabo for a month. My knees hurt, by back hurts and it's because of weight I don't know if I can take the long drive. I am nearing 50. This summer will be spent cleaning and schlepping and doing tasks in the furnace that is Tucson.

 

I love teaching my kids. But paperwork is just crazy now and we have all this stuff to manage. Our lives are so different now. I wonder about happiness constantly.

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