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First Memory


Marc DuQuesne
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I very vividly remember Christmas when I was in 1st grade in 1989, when we got our NES. I remember it was addressed to both my brother and I and my parents purposely saving it to be the last one opened. My mom kept trying to call my attention over to open it with my brother, and I said he could do it himself because I was too into whatever it was I was playing with. She insisted of course, we opened, and were blown away.

 

A couple years ago, my parents found the tape they had taken of that Christmas (which I'd be shocked if it had ever been watched since being taken). I told them the story, so we watched to see it unfold... only for it to be the complete opposite of how I remembered. I was sitting patiently waiting to open it while my mom tried to pry my brother away from whatever he had so we could open together (I also had a cold, which I have no memory of). Somehow my brain had put me in my brothers place and he in mine. No matter how hard I think about it, I still remember it my way, not the way the tape clearly showed.

 

Memory is some fascinating stuff. My wife and I will remember a conversation we had the day before completely differently. Likely neither of us are wrong, we just remember different aspects of it intertwined with our own perceptions and expectations. Listening to my mother and sister in law recollect their fights when SIL was growing up is especially entertaining for me, because of how skewed their memories are.

This is blowing my mind

 

Are you sure it isn't you blowing his?

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I remember my brother teaching me how to get our TI-99 to endlessly display "I LOVE MOMMY".

 

But he also taught me around the same time that showing someone your middle finger means "I love you" so who really knows

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I very vividly remember Christmas when I was in 1st grade in 1989, when we got our NES. I remember it was addressed to both my brother and I and my parents purposely saving it to be the last one opened. My mom kept trying to call my attention over to open it with my brother, and I said he could do it himself because I was too into whatever it was I was playing with. She insisted of course, we opened, and were blown away.

 

A couple years ago, my parents found the tape they had taken of that Christmas (which I'd be shocked if it had ever been watched since being taken). I told them the story, so we watched to see it unfold... only for it to be the complete opposite of how I remembered. I was sitting patiently waiting to open it while my mom tried to pry my brother away from whatever he had so we could open together (I also had a cold, which I have no memory of). Somehow my brain had put me in my brothers place and he in mine. No matter how hard I think about it, I still remember it my way, not the way the tape clearly showed.

 

Memory is some fascinating stuff. My wife and I will remember a conversation we had the day before completely differently. Likely neither of us are wrong, we just remember different aspects of it intertwined with our own perceptions and expectations. Listening to my mother and sister in law recollect their fights when SIL was growing up is especially entertaining for me, because of how skewed their memories are.

Outstanding post.

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Guest Robin

The first thing I can recall as a memory instead of a muddled combination of how family events are retold is seeing my little brother in the hospital after his birth. I was three years old and I clearly recall being happy I had a little brother. However I also recall being upset because my Pops had bought a stuffed Snoopy toy for me to give to my new little bro as a way for me to be included in his arrival, I wanted to keep that Snoopy and argued the baby doesn't even know what Snoopy is so what gives because I'm the one that likes Snoopy. Now that I think about it this could contribute to why I can't stand the Peanuts TV specials anymore.

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I find this hard to do cause most of my early memories seem to be around the same time, and I can logically figure out WHEN they were (ages 3-4) but I don't know what order they came in.

 

There's this one where I'm playing in this metal drum and there's blood everywhere. Theres screaming somewhere, but I can't see where.

 

There was some large animal moving around-- too big to get into the drum cause I remember it was trying to smell me. Oddly, sometimes I remember this as my dad instead of an animal.

 

I remember moving a lot too. I clearly remember my dad yelling at some old lady cause she was renting a house and my dad said she claimed there was a basement, but there wasn't.

 

My dad had all these oil drums he had to store. I wasn't supposed to be around them but I remember playing some game where I was knocking on one, and I want to say something was knocking back, but it was probably my imagination.

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Guest El Chalupacabra

This thread has made me curious about how memory works. I wonder if memories change over time because each time we recall a memory, we are actually recalling what we recalled before. Each time, becoming a little bit different as our perception changes as we age (not to mention each person perceives an event differently). Throw in looking at pictures of the event, or stories from other people, on top of all that, and no wonder memories change over time.

 

I think people born from the 1990s on where video recording became common practice, especially post-smart phones, have it a lot easier having access to events as they really happened.

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My earliest memory was from right around the time I began walking. I remember following someone into our garage (there were guests at our house but I don't remember who) and them turning around, going inside, and leaving me in there. I remember hearing people looking for me inside, and then the door opened and someone picked me up. It wasn't traumatic or anything. I honestly believe this could have happened several times. My parents don't remember this specific event, but they can confirm that they frequently had people over, there was a beer fridge in the garage, and I liked to follow certain people around the entire time they were there. So it's likely. I also remember the clown from my first birthday party. I remember walking through the sliding glass door to see him sitting on the hearth, and then me crying about it but it wasn't because I was scared.

My oldest child can recall events that happened when he was 1-2 years old. Things that aren't recorded anywhere. And they're all pretty random non-events. He doesn't remember any of his surgeries or his first birthday party, but he does remember one of my friends singing to him at the store. He remembers the time we put him in the giant bin of pumpkins at Sam's Club, but not his first Halloween later that week.

Memory is weird.

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This thread has made me curious about how memory works. I wonder if memories change over time because each time we recall a memory, we are actually recalling what we recalled before. Each time, becoming a little bit different as our perception changes as we age (not to mention each person perceives an event differently). Throw in looking at pictures of the event, or stories from other people, on top of all that, and no wonder memories change over time.

 

I think people born from the 1990s on where video recording became common practice, especially post-smart phones, have it a lot easier having access to events as they really happened.

That curiosity is why I started this thread. My first memory has no ambiguity except for my own interpretation (which is Human and flawed). I was alone and there were no pictures taken. Nobody told me about the experience. I actually was hoping somebody else out there had that same "eureka" experience I did, but I suspect it has something to do with a peculiarity. I am extremely curious now if anyone with the same glitch would have a similar recollection. I have no idea how old I was. I have pieces of memories that I have no idea what order they go in, but I know that one is first. I have never felt like that again, and that feeling left a permanent impression. I suspect it is because my brain developed more slowly than other people (not to say less completely, though that is a fear). When I reached "consciousness" I was old enough to remember it.

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"our memories change each time they are recalled..."

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/am-i-right/201307/your-memory-isnt-what-you-think-it-is

 

 

Most people have so-called flashbulb memories of where they were and what they were doing when something momentous happened: the assassination of President John F. Kennedy, say...But as clear and detailed as these memories feel, psychologists find they are surprisingly inaccurate."
"With time, memories not only lose their rich vividness, but they can also become distorted, as our true experiences tango with a fictional past."
I wonder why any of us put any trust into eyewitnesses.
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Guest Robin

Healthy memory is complicated, with different conditions having an effect on it, but it's not so faulty as to be assumed to be unreliable or false by default.

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"our memories change each time they are recalled..."

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/am-i-right/201307/your-memory-isnt-what-you-think-it-is

 

 

Most people have so-called flashbulb memories of where they were and what they were doing when something momentous happened: the assassination of President John F. Kennedy, say...But as clear and detailed as these memories feel, psychologists find they are surprisingly inaccurate."

http://www.smithsonianmag.com/science-nature/how-our-brains-make-memories-14466850/

 

"With time, memories not only lose their rich vividness, but they can also become distorted, as our true experiences tango with a fictional past."

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/important-new-theory-explains-where-old-memories-go

 

I wonder why any of us put any trust into eyewitnesses.

I do remember 9/11 and the Challenger blowing up rather clearly...

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