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help correcting my comic text

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The Uprising Exar Kun

The Uprising Exar Kun


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I'm Steve from Belgium, so I'm not a native English speaker.
I've created all the visuals for a scifi comic, but since I'm not good in writing English I implemented very little dialogue.

Is there anyone here who would like to help me correct the sentences I have? it's like 20 lines,
and if this is not the correct place to do this, can someone then point me in the right direction?


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