monkeygirl Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 So, a couple weeks ago or so, I was pushing myself to finish painting already, was so weary I figured I'd put the paint tray closer to me and ended up stepping in it. Even though that little voice inside said 'eeehhhhhhh-is this really a good idea?' A few weeks ago, I ran many of my votive candle holders through the dishwasher with enameled bakeware and now,every time I cook meat, the kicthen smells of freesia and patchouli-not entirely unpleasant, but the novelty is wearing thin. I didn't clean all the wax out of one of the things, obviously. Even if you didn't do anything recently, please also now tell me about mistakes you really know youi're making as you make them, please. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
monkeygirl Posted May 8, 2015 Author Share Posted May 8, 2015 THANKS A LOT GUYS GAWD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms. Spam Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 Maintaining a relationship with my family. Now i get 20 phone calls a day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Good God a Bear Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 I don't make mistakes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Krawlie Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 You forgot a period on the end of that sentence, GGAB. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 I think he forgot the question mark. I don't make mistakes? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 My most boneheaded move: I once dated a girl who wasn't very pretty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Human Torch Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 I don't need an umbrella! What's the worst that could happen? 23 years later; 4 children and being a bearded Donna Reed is my work history... okay maybe more bearded Lucy Ricardo. Meanwhile my wife chats about all the things her co-workers/friends do and laugh over, how they go on luncheons and gets her nails did and etc. etc. Me? Baby Wyatt can sing along to Frozen now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mara Jade Skywalker Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 I didn't realize my doctor's office had moved and went to the wrong location. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
monkeygirl Posted May 8, 2015 Author Share Posted May 8, 2015 I hate most of you now Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Kurgan Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 Making breakfast a few weeks ago, I went to rest my hand on the front burner of the stove, to make sure I hadn't turned on the wrong element. I turned on the wrong element. My hand still has a swirly pattern on it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms. Spam Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 I have a tendency to think a lot in my car and often will miss my exit and go 10 miles on the highway before I realize I have to turn around.Making breakfast a few weeks ago, I went to rest my hand on the front burner of the stove, to make sure I hadn't turned on the wrong element.I turned on the wrong element.My hand still has a swirly pattern on it.OUCH! I hate that because when you take a hot shower the hand is still uber sensitive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 I hate most of you now Just now? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Human Torch Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 Dumb: Drove without insurance. Rolled car. Just bought it the day before. Dumber: Single vehicle accident. No injuries. Reported self to police. Why? I asked myself that too. Dumb: As a teen, disliked old boss. Heard new boss was hired. Wrote letter about hopeful changes to new regime under new boss. Dumber: Put letter on boss's desk. Didn't realize old boss still worked there until the next week. Dumb: Years into being Mr. Mom, I'm at wife's company picnic. I see a dude touchy and really friendly with my wife. I WTF that, just like Keaton. Dumber: I forgot my wife told me her best friend at work was gay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Driver Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 She TOLD you he was gay.... but he ISN'T!!!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Human Torch Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 You're evil. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerina Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 This one time a few years ago, Jaycie asked me if I wanted to be an Admin. I said sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Driver Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 win. clz plz. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
monkeygirl Posted May 8, 2015 Author Share Posted May 8, 2015 SRSLY Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3 & 6 years to go... Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 Here's a good one. I was driving my car in the rain toward a Walmart near me. As I was almost there, I came to a point in the road, where it was very flooded. Under a elevated railroad track. So, I said, 'fuck that, I guess I am not going there.' So, I turned around by driving down this road that turned out to be an entrance (back?) to a company parking lot. I noticed in this parking lot there was some flooding as well. So, I went in very cautiously trying to drive over parts that were not so deep. This was working, until I turned around to go out. When I started to leave, I thought this part was not deep. But, it was. So deep that the water was up to the bottom of the car door, and the water stalled the engine. Then, the car wouldn't start. Water starts coming into the car. I am wondering what the fuck am I going to do. After about 20-30 minutes, the car started. But, the engine no longer sounded right. I drove home and the engine, like I said, did not sound right. A few months later, in December (2012?), I was driving to work and something blew underneath the car. The oil pan, I believe. So, all the oil leaked out and the engine blew/died. This was all due to the water. I had the car towed to my house. Luckily a buddy of mine, that is a mechanic, found me an old engine and put it in for me. Older engine with more miles. That makes the sting a little less, because he really saved my ass on this. But, I cannot stop kicking myself in the ass about this for getting stuck in that water. Just for Soundgarden's Superunknown, which turns out I had already. What a ****ing dope. I still have the car, but i'd rather have my first engine back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
monkeygirl Posted May 8, 2015 Author Share Posted May 8, 2015 okay. That alone makes this thread worth it. Thank you. I feel like Anthony Hopkins now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cashmere Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 Driving through water is scary stuff. I've seen videos of cars being swept away by what doesn't even look like that much water. Today I ran my longest distance ever with nothing but water to consume after. My blood sugar was crashing so hard I wasn't sure I could make the drive home without passing out. I almost pulled over and called my husband to leave work and come get me but kept driving instead. Made it home but it was a close one. Then I puked up every last drop of that water, violently. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Burt Posted May 10, 2015 Share Posted May 10, 2015 Yesterday, I shaved off a 3 month beard but left behind a glorious moustache. I did a few errands in public today and realized that yes, while they 90s may be back in style, moustaches are not. I am stubbornly clinging to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Good God a Bear Posted May 10, 2015 Share Posted May 10, 2015 You forgot a period on the end of that sentence, GGAB.I left off the period for artistic reasons... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Odine Posted May 10, 2015 Share Posted May 10, 2015 Biggest bonehead move ever: It was when I was about 20 and still smoking weed... I was a little stoned and decided I'd try and figure out what was wrong with my distortion pedal for my guitar. Did all the obvious stuff like changed the battery, opened it up and looked at the wiring. Then I got the power adapter and jiggled that around in the socket.. still the thing wouldn't come on. I wonder if the power adapter is broken too? I thought in my infinite wisdom. So instead of doing the sensible method of inserting the power adapter into another pedal and see if it works.. I put the business end of the plug on my tongue. 240 volts of mains electricity fired through the 9volt adapter and into the mucus membrane that is my tongue causing it to whip like a snake, and me fall of the end of the sofa in fright and pain. Bad buzz. My housemate pointed a laughed hysterically as he watched the whole thing from the other sofa and could see the entire thought process of my stoned brain go through with it. "Is he gonna do it?" "Yep he's gonna electrocute himself in the mouth." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts