Ms. Spam Posted May 8, 2015 Author Share Posted May 8, 2015 Ha! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacen123 Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 OH hey! Seth's girlfriend just made a whole line of cards for this. Just pretend I bought and sent this to you. http://emilymcdowell.com/collections/all/products/everything-happens-for-a-reason-cardI had no idea those were made by his girlfriend! A friend from college (who recently underwent chemotherapy for breast cancer) was recently talking about these on Facebook. The cards have definitely made an impression on people! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerina Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 Oh yeah. That's Seth's live-in girlfriend. When you see him whine about her success on here, that's what he's bitching about. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cashmere Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 That's pretty cool! I saw these on Facebook too earlier this week. I have a feeling she's about to get inundated with orders. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
monkeygirl Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 SPAM AND NICOLE-I so want to just hug your troubles away. I am angry at the universe for allowing you each to be treated so poorly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms. Spam Posted May 10, 2015 Author Share Posted May 10, 2015 For mothers day my mom got moved to rehab. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Destiny Skywalker Posted May 10, 2015 Share Posted May 10, 2015 That's a good sign! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Burt Posted May 11, 2015 Share Posted May 11, 2015 Wow, Spam, that's rough. I wish I had some words of wisdom, but all I got is a "hang tough". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms. Spam Posted May 15, 2015 Author Share Posted May 15, 2015 I'm leaving tomorrow to head out to get my Mom's house walker ready. Turns out medicaid will only payout so much. So Mom's going to be released sooner than I think she should. I'm really concerned that once she is home from the rehab hospital facility that she'll slide back into her old habits of not eating and not leaving her room. They've been doing upper body strengthening exercises as well as working with her replacement bum leg-hip. A couple of things I wanna bounce off you guys to see if I am going down the right path: My Mom's house is a paid off ranch style house with no steps and her shower is already step in (No bathtub to step over). She just has to pay property taxes which is set at 3800 a year and utilities. The main house is 2600 square feet with 4 bedrooms and two bathrooms, then there is an attached apartment that my sister lives in next door and a guest house my brother lives in. I'm advocating that my brother and sister - people who have not held jobs in 5 years and have sponged off my Mom - move into the mainhouse with my Mom and they clean up the apartment and guest house and rent them out for income. They wouldn't even have to do much work as they could hire a service to take care of vetting the renters and payments as well as clean up if they wanted to go that route and then the three of them would have some extra money coming in to cover additional expenses with Social Security as my Mom will collect hers and my brother gets disability. It's the house she's known for 25 years and she's got pickled brains (you have to get her early in the morning to have meaningful discussions that she will remember 50% of) from the alcoholism. Many of my family are actually pressuring her to sell and move into an apartment which I think is a bad idea for a number of reasons - they'll have to pay rent and there is no guarantee she'll get a first floor apartment as right now her mobility is limited as well as this means 3 people who are barely self-sufficient will have to live in less than 1200 square feet. My brother wants something new - which is what i suspect. Three new commodes have been installed as well as all the plumbing fixed. The house just needs a deep clean which is what I am going to do instead of fun end of school things this week. Am I crazy? Do all these other people have a point? the other one question is cat related. TAMI! I want to take my cats with me. I'm leaving tonight/early in the morning. I fly back on Wednesday and return Friday afternoon for Memorial Day weekend and drive back that Memorial Day Monday as I have some end of school year stuff. I will miss my Bob and Nanner fiercely but Nanner hates travel. Hates it. She rips fur out and cries until she's hoarse. Bob has never gone further in a car than 5 miles to the vet but he things it is the schitznit. He loves looking out the window but he's not keen on being in his carrying case even if it is huge (bought a big dog one for trips). Is it better to leave them for their sake? I mean I am being selfish because I will miss them. Bob has never met dogs and my brother gave my Mom a puppy to cheer her up (which he got the money for Grandma but why on gods green earth does he think a chihuahua will fix my Mom's depression right up?) plus the big dogs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
monkeygirl Posted May 15, 2015 Share Posted May 15, 2015 Well,I like your idea about housing. That makes MUCH more sense. They can rent out the other 2 spaces and it'll save everyone money. Keep reminding your siblings that this isn't FOREVAR. Mom will eventually pass then they can do what they want. It's about what's best for HER now. Cats, I dunno!!! I am headed to Spokane for the weekend to help Jackie with her Mom's memorial and I was having the same thoughts of taking the boys. But I'm only gone through Sunday. What happens to them if you leave them? Who stays with them? Ripping fur out is SERIOUS stress. She doesn't need that ****. And with dogs in the mix? I dunno-I think you have enough going on without adding Cat Mom Guilt to the week by taking the babies and having it all go horribly wrong. But I'd like to see someone go by and pat them on their little heads if you leave them, not just alone with a giant bowl of kibble-though they sleep SO much. If you want to take them JUST because you'll miss them, leave them at home. If you think THEY'D rather be with you, even with all the kitteh drama, take. I SWORE I was going to get these 2 used to riding in the car so when they got this old it's never be an issue. FAIL. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
monkeygirl Posted May 15, 2015 Share Posted May 15, 2015 AND ALSO, if poeple could just stop dying for a little while? That's be good, too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms. Spam Posted May 15, 2015 Author Share Posted May 15, 2015 Yeah. I've been trying to sell them on the renting idea. It pisses me off to no end that Tim and Tina are seeing this as a more of what can I get then what is right for Mom. I got my Grandma on board. But there's still people close by that keep pushing for her to sell the house and move. You are so right about this being about Mom and they just need to see it that way. They found out Mom has 3 CD interest bearing accounts with a bunch of money in them (She intends to give this to us kids when she dies so she just keeps renewing them instead of spending the money). I think it's laziness on Tim and Tina's part because they are thinking of the work of renters. But really it is less work than a 40 hour work week. What do you really do? You just find people who want to rent. Run a background/credit check which you can pay for online, and clean up when they move out as well as call a repairman when something breaks. As for kitteh's I think it is about the guilt that I'll have to leave them alone for a week with just food and litter and water. I can ask that someone come around and check on them but it will be brief. My friend Rick works at an art museum - the McNay - which is close to my house so it will just be on the weekdays during lunch or after work. Bob talks to me when I get home telling me all about his day. And Nanner's finally letting her tail grow out from the overgrooming from baby kittehs in the laundry room she stressed over.AND ALSO, if poeple could just stop dying for a little while? That's be good, too.I NO RITE!? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Destiny Skywalker Posted May 15, 2015 Share Posted May 15, 2015 I'm leaving tomorrow to head out to get my Mom's house walker ready. Turns out medicaid will only payout so much. So Mom's going to be released sooner than I think she should. I'm really concerned that once she is home from the rehab hospital facility that she'll slide back into her old habits of not eating and not leaving her room. They've been doing upper body strengthening exercises as well as working with her replacement bum leg-hip.Medicaid sucks but you can fight back a little bit. Ask to see the records of her initial assessment and how long they thought it would take, and then her final assessment. I got my mom like an extra month of speech therapy this way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms. Spam Posted May 15, 2015 Author Share Posted May 15, 2015 Ugh. So many grammar mistakes. Than and thinking. Doh. Yeah. I am going to try and fight it. I want her to have some weight. Mom's still having trouble eating but then who can eat powdered eggs? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest El Chalupacabra Posted May 15, 2015 Share Posted May 15, 2015 Geeze Spam, I feel bad for you and I can really relate to what you are going through, because I went through some of that with my Mom passing away, and my dad having all kinds of health issues (he's been hospitalized 4 times, 3 of which were month or longer stays) since August 2013 when my mom died. My dad is bad enough where he should be in some assisted living, but he won't listen. And my brother wasn't very helpful in the beginning (he has been A LOT more help lately though), so I was doing a lot of care stuff and legwork for my dad, so I can kind of relate to your predicament with your siblings not pitching in to help. The issue I think you might consider before renting, however, is this: cost of renting those spaces out. First, you have to consider if ANYTHING breaks, the tenant is going to expect it fixed fast, and as you know in AZ, air conditioners are probably the highest of those costs, and most frequent. Can your mom afford such an expense. Second thing is a lot of tenants are scumbags. If they trash the place, then skip out on 6 months back rent it is pure hell getting them evicted. Once you finally do, you then have the cost of having to repair said damage (because it will almost always exceed the deposit, sometimes by many times), then try to find someone else, and there's no guarantee the same thing won't happen again. Just something to consider. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerina Posted May 15, 2015 Share Posted May 15, 2015 Don't rent to scumbags. It's fairly easy to tell from someone's history if they're a scumbag. I'd tell your brother and sister that if they won't do what they need to to take care of your mother, then she's going to have to sell and take that money and all her current income to San Antonio to live with you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest El Chalupacabra Posted May 15, 2015 Share Posted May 15, 2015 Don't rent to scumbags. It's fairly easy to tell from someone's history if they're a scumbag. It's obvious not to rent to scumbags, but not so obvious to determine who will be one. It doesn't sound to me like Spam's mom is up to property management (or doing credit bureau checks, background checks, etc), and her siblings aren't responsible enough to do it, so something to consider is hiring a landlord management company to do it for them. the way I understand it, they take a piece of the rent to do it. I'd tell your brother and sister that if they won't do what they need to to take care of your mother, then she's going to have to sell and take that money and all her current income to San Antonio to live with you.+1! And they won't get to move in, either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms. Spam Posted May 16, 2015 Author Share Posted May 16, 2015 I actually think I will have to move to Tucson. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms. Spam Posted May 16, 2015 Author Share Posted May 16, 2015 Krawlie knows how much that would suck. I know I may have to suspend my Masters for right now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms. Spam Posted May 16, 2015 Author Share Posted May 16, 2015 Chalupa, I think getting a realty company to do the work would be a good option. They don't need much to live off if my brother can curb his excessive pot and video game habit. Karl used to rent the apartment and guest house to college students at the U of A during the school year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest El Chalupacabra Posted May 16, 2015 Share Posted May 16, 2015 I actually think I will have to move to Tucson. Krawlie knows how much that would suck.I know I may have to suspend my Masters for right now. Tuscon isn't the greatest place to move, IMHO, but there's a lot worse out there. Would you be moving in with your mom if that happened? Does your college/university have an online option for your masters program? Chalupa, I think getting a realty company to do the work would be a good option. They don't need much to live off if my brother can curb his excessive pot and video game habit. Karl used to rent the apartment and guest house to college students at the U of A during the school year.So the renting idea is not uncharted territory, huh? Yeah, if affordable, I would look into something like a realty company to help out with the management side, just to CYA. And college kids are a good option, as long as they are vetted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms. Spam Posted May 17, 2015 Author Share Posted May 17, 2015 Thanks, Chalupa and everyone. So... The disaster so far is that they're literally throwing my Mom's life away. There's no way the house is ready for her when she gets released. Someone is painting but she has no bed and man have they collected some years in that house. And my brothers and sisters are throwing it in a dumpster. Good things too that could be sold instead for money. I don't even know where to begin. And she wants to move to GA. With a house by a stream. I got to Tucson last night at 7 PM there time and I ate at 9 PM at a shwarma place because they couldn't get their act together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerina Posted May 17, 2015 Share Posted May 17, 2015 I'm tellin ya! Just threaten to take her home with you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms. Spam Posted May 18, 2015 Author Share Posted May 18, 2015 Cerina, that is indeed one of my moms toilets. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerina Posted May 18, 2015 Share Posted May 18, 2015 Oh hell. Just put her in the car. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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