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Trolls hate fatties, feminists and women. and themselves.


Destiny Skywalker
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Kurgan never fails to tell it like it is, better than anyone can articulate. You is real good with the words and stuff.

 

And Pong, I know it was a cheap shot...'swhy I said "Just sayin..." We live in a superficial world, and superficial trivialities shape peoples lives and thoughts and actions whether we like it or not. therefore... just saying...

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I hear what Kurgan is saying about insecurities, but I don't think it comes down to attractiveness always. I'm a woman who works in a male-dominated industry. Is it so much to ask to be respected for what I know and what I do, regardless of gender? The hysteria when a woman became chief of our organization was ridiculous. I heard men who accused her of sleeping around to get there. That has never come up with any of the past chiefs. The reason she got the job is because she gets shit done, plain and simple. She's socially awkward and hyper competitive, for sure, but she's not there to make friends, and that's pretty stereotypical of most executives. But a woman gets put in charge and all the 50-year old men are up in arms. Go figure. All the technically-minded women get driven into management because the men think we're too stupid to handle anything difficult. It's bullshit and it has nothing to do with how hot I am or not.

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I don't even know how you do it, Destiny. I work in a school and pretty much am fulfilling my woman duties. There are a lot of girl students that go into nursing for the same reason a lot pick teaching. It's basically marking time until you can get a husband and have some kids and will provide you with some income. Many girls never try for something more in my district and often the girls are the first to drop out because in a Hispanic household they are schooled to raise families and the importance of education is secondary. I hate it.

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I hear what Kurgan is saying about insecurities, but I don't think it comes down to attractiveness always. I'm a woman who works in a male-dominated industry. Is it so much to ask to be respected for what I know and what I do, regardless of gender? The hysteria when a woman became chief of our organization was ridiculous. I heard men who accused her of sleeping around to get there. That has never come up with any of the past chiefs. The reason she got the job is because she gets **** done, plain and simple. She's socially awkward and hyper competitive, for sure, but she's not there to make friends, and that's pretty stereotypical of most executives. But a woman gets put in charge and all the 50-year old men are up in arms. Go figure. All the technically-minded women get driven into management because the men think we're too stupid to handle anything difficult. It's bull**** and it has nothing to do with how hot I am or not.

I'd plus one this a buncha times if I could. There's a lot more to life than insecurity about one's looks/ability to attract a decent mate. Hell, I can think of hundreds of things to be gut-wrenchingly neurotic and insecure over, and at least seven of them having nothing to do with women!

 

Regarding "Is it so much to ask to be respected for what I know and what I do, regardless of gender?": I have a few examples I could give from the workplace, but I see this and interpret it as sexism in gaming groups very often. It's one of those things where you suspect somebody is being patronizing or overly nice or ignoring another player's suggestions (generally, just acting differently... not mean, just in a way that kinda undermines them) cuz they have vagiboobs, but there's no smoking gun to prove it (insert wiener joke here) -- It just happens so often and to the same gender, it seems kinda obvious after awhile.

 

Of course, I've heard a few genuine horror stories too, just can't think of anything I've witness myself that is worth sharing.

 

:eek:

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I still think it comes down to insecurity.

 

In the scenario Destiny Skywalker described, where a bunch of older dudes got all uptight because a woman got an executive position in their organization, guess what? That's probably insecurity. To these kinds of guys, masculinity has a lot to do with professional status. A woman upstaging them is an implicit threat. A threat that ultimately, they will become redundant in the eyes of women, since a woman has shown herself better than they at their own game, basically. And while I can't say for sure, I'd suspect it would be exponentially worse if your female executive WAS hot. Because she's strong in both what they consider alpha feminine traits AND alpha masculine traits. That being so, they might as well not exist as men. Or at least that's how they'd likely feel about it, though they probably wouldn't admit it. Not in so many words. It would come out in immature and boorish behavior.

 

As for the women, such conduct would undoubtedly be highly annoying and frustrating to deal with. I doubt, however, that it would drive them to their keyboards to start posting on Tumblr or Jezebel unless some aspect of it threatened their own egos in some way. Men are not simply acquiescing to the gloating of the superior sex and accepting their redundancy like they're supposed to. Or like their educated female egos require them to. THAT gets under their skin, most likely far more than the actual stupidity the men are displaying itself does. If women had no real "need" to upstage men quite so much, they'd regard such conduct with aloof disdain, but most likely nothing more.

 

Man - man the gender AND man the species, is an incredibly insecure animal, driven mostly by ego. It is a rare specimen of either sex that can take such circumstances in stride. Many people are thus driven to a host of passive (and not so passive) aggressive and cheap conduct in a vain attempt to undermine the other side in some way. That's why I opted to be a professional driver for a living. I don't have to deal with a lot of this kind of silliness and games.

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That makes me sad, too, Spam. I'm not saying every woman needs to go out there and take the world by storm. But they deserve a choice, and it aggravates me because there are smart girls out there who could contribute to making this world a better place, but their only option is from the proverbial kitchen. I grew up in a home where education was valued and my parents let me follow my passion and pick my career and supported me for it.

 

I don't even know how you do it, Destiny.

Because I love what I do, honestly, and it probably helps that I've always been a bit of a tomboy. I always found it easy to get along with guys because I have a lot of similar interests. But since I started moving up in the ranks in my company, the resistance has started. People stopped helping me when I had questions, and rumblings got back go me about how it made them "nervous" that management liked me. They started picking fights with me when I published documents so that I wouldn't meet deadlines. I work with some very smart people who are either lazy, unable to finish a project, or make things way harder than they need to be. I understand what level of complexity a project needs, and I don't miss deadlines. That's why management likes me. I'm also not afraid to stand up in front of a room of executives and argue my case. And I stand up for my team members, I don't throw them under the bus. I'm the only woman on my team, but I've never played the sexism card. I don't think it's entirely that, but I would say it's in the 25-50% range. I'm also comparably young compared to some of my team, and there's definitely some educational snobbery going on because I don't have a M.S. or PhD. Two of the men admitted their wives weren't comfortable with me, which is awkward. They all have stay-at-home spouses.

 

But all of this is exhausting, and yes, it's starting to get to me. I don't like the tension at work, because I'm naturally a peacemaker. I work and come home to 2 very energetic kids. I have a husband who works hard, too, and gets some level of similar flack from his teammates who are clearly threatened by him because he's the youngest on the team but probably the smartest and most efficient. I'm looking into switching jobs because I'm tired of fighting these guys and having barriers thrown up. The most appealing part about the job I want most? The hiring manager is a woman with a PhD. I desperately need a mentor.

 

Kurgan, I'll agree that most of it boils down to insecurities, but it isn't attractiveness. As for my aforementioned female exec, she's pretty but plain. I once asked a former colleague what I did to make middle-aged men feel so threatened. He responded, "We used to rule the world, and now we don't." Touche.

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  • 4 weeks later...

So I bring this up again in light of this story:

http://madworldnews.com/angry-dad-revenge-bullies/

 

You know, I get it, trolling is sometimes funny. But what is funny about rape? If I found out my son "trolled" women online like that, I would absolutely lose my shit on him. Can anyone give me some insight into the minds of these deranged little ***holes?

 

This also comes on the heels of a friend who is a tv sports reporter having some guy just completely harass her in a similar manner on Twitter. I seriously don't get it.

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I don't get it either. I can't tell if it's the internet or kids that are so wildly different. Maybe both?

 

Times haven't changed, someone's being mean on the internet, but I don't get all the rape jokes. I can't recall rape jokes being so prevalent, and this weird aggression towards women.

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It's always been prevalent among a certain type, you just probably didn't have anything to do with them.

 

Unfortunately, I knew a few of them. Not saying I was friends with them, but I knew them. And I don't think it's appropriate to call them jokes. Jokes are intended to be funny, these types of comments are just intended to shock, disturb and show dominance.

 

But until there's a cultural shift away from all rape jokes and hopes, it's going to continue. Why would a 22 year old who grew up hearing mom say that she hopes such-and-such criminal gets raped in prison think anything is wrong about saying the same about someone he dislikes

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From the blog:

I know clubhouses. I lived in a dorm. I get it. Guys will be guys. Guys will say dumb crap, often. But I can’t ever remember, drunk, in a clubhouse, with best friends, with anyone, ever speaking like this to someone…

This. Maybe this is more old-man thinking on my part, but in my day we WERE asses, but there were certain lines you didn't cross. It seems to me as though we are reverting to a state of barbarism.

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So I bring this up again in light of this story:

http://madworldnews.com/angry-dad-revenge-bullies/

 

You know, I get it, trolling is sometimes funny. But what is funny about rape? If I found out my son "trolled" women online like that, I would absolutely lose my **** on him. Can anyone give me some insight into the minds of these deranged little ***holes?

 

This also comes on the heels of a friend who is a tv sports reporter having some guy just completely harass her in a similar manner on Twitter. I seriously don't get it.

One of the few times I think of them having a "taste of their own medicine" kind of experience. But, like, actually happening.

 

edit, to add: **** yeah, Kurt Schilling!

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As somebody who frequents feminist websites, I often wonder how many so-called trolls really are trolls and how many are simply people who disagree with an ideology that cannot handle dissent.

I'll definately second this. On the other hand, the article ALSO talks a great deal about private messages containing death threats, rape threats, the most caustic of insults and so on.

 

That said, how much of this flagrant hostility really stems from the frustration of dealing with SUCH a closed belief system whose main adherants are so up front about their own sense of moral superiority and entitlement. I don't CONDONE the trolling, mind you, but human nature being what it is, I'm not surprised that it happens.

 

Ultimately, it is cowardly behavior. They do have the power to stop entering discussions they know heavily lean in a certain direction. Moreover, anyone who makes death /rape / beating threats in the shadows of the internet usually turns out to be a Kong-sized puss in real life, and would not dare back up their hatred with action. Shrunken nuts syndrome in full effect.

 

While I do not agree with those hardliners of the closed belief system you refer to, i'm sure they feel they have the moral high ground if no other reason than the opposition hypocritically wishes to force their will--the very thing they believe is happening to them.

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Ultimately, it is cowardly behavior. They do have the power to stop entering discussions they know heavily lean in a certain direction. Moreover, anyone who makes death /rape / beating threats in the shadows of the internet usually turns out to be a Kong-sized puss in real life, and would not dare back up their hatred with action. Shrunken nuts syndrome in full effect.

 

While I do not agree with those hardliners of the closed belief system you refer to, i'm sure they feel they have the moral high ground if no other reason than the opposition hypocritically wishes to force their will--the very thing they believe is happening to them.

Plus, the s**ty, trolling behavior just ends up feeding ammunition to the more oppressed than thou crowd. It's a crappy situation all around. Everyone's bad conduct ends up feeding off of everyone else's.

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I personally think it is a combo of two things:

1. How kids are raised these days - Sorry, but a lot of the parents are too busy trying to be their kids best friend and fitting in with their group of kids then actually parenting. And when someone that isn't their parents says something to them, their parents go ape **** on them, sue them, etc. So I blame a lot of the parents.

2. The internet allows people to be anonymous. And this anonymity gives them the feeling they can say what they want without thought to the person on the other end. I guarantee you the majority of them wouldn't say it to someone's face because they are too cowardly.

 

On the flip side I think some people are way to overly sensitive. I know I used to be and realized it and now I actually laugh at a lot of things. I actually enjoy CM's posts and they make me laugh. So people need to lighten up. But if it's a post like 'You're worthless you should just die' then the person who typed that needs to get their ass whipped.

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