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Say Something Random II - Eclectic Depression


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I know you care about and feel responsible for your family, but dude, you've got to throw up some boundaries. They've gotten so much worse just in the last 10 years or so. You shouldn't have to deal with that. Especially since it's only going to get worse.

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Guest El Chalupacabra

I know you care about and feel responsible for your family, but dude, you've got to throw up some boundaries. They've gotten so much worse just in the last 10 years or so. You shouldn't have to deal with that. Especially since it's only going to get worse.

I can't really add much to this, but Spam, please take care of You.

 

You are are being taken advantage of and abused mentally. You have a good heart, and forgive me for saying so, your family members know this too, and are just using you.

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I know you care about and feel responsible for your family, but dude, you've got to throw up some boundaries. They've gotten so much worse just in the last 10 years or so. You shouldn't have to deal with that. Especially since it's only going to get worse.

I can't really add much to this, but Spam, please take care of You.

 

You are are being taken advantage of and abused mentally. You have a good heart, and forgive me for saying so, your family members know this too, and are just using you.

This, a million times this. Please cut them off after Grandma passes.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Contrary to popular perception I dont actually get drunk a lot since since my kids went from one to two to ballooning to four. I do get tipsy though, and I dunno... drunkish. Sorta like Blackish, that TV show, I guess. You know, straddling that line. Anyway, margaritas tonight. My wife took me to a going away party for one of her besty bests and on the way home I got the Teri Garr thumbs up... I did not out run the boss, walked that fine line. Congrats me. It was another hard reminder however that I relate more to ladies than dudes. The conversation in the kitchen was freaking on point and hilarious, those manly dudes have no idea what they are missing in the living room as they pretend to like ice fishing and camping. Afterthought: I know I did good though and not just drunkish perception because while my wife didnmt pat me on the head and say thatll do like I was Babe, she gave me the look like ohh yeahs But Ive said too much. Afterthought again: The bestest part about being drunkish is hiding easter Weggs because like where they are will be a surprise even to me... or in your readerlimgs case just to you. well if you too hids eggs in a wibbly state of minds.

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I just posted three times in a Youtube live stream, and I can confirm there is some sort of endorphin hit when you hear someone say your name and interact with you. So I get people that dig Youbtube and other social media so much. Then again, I am super suffering with empty nest right now. So maybe that is it, rather than anything to do with social media. I dunno. All my babies are in school, one out of the house, and my favoritest lady rarely (never really it is so rare) comes home on her lunch break. Anyway. Call your parents or text them, they miss you. Unless theyre dicks then, I dunno, call a bud you havent chatted to in a while. Social media has its upside, even if the rest of it is stupid horrible balloons. That was supposed be baloney, but Apple corrected it to gallons. That was supposed to be balloons.

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Also guys, I can't quit FB. I'm the social media coordinator for our homeschool group. And it's where I get like 90% of my homeschool ideas and recommendations. But I'm seriously considering unfriending or just unfollowing most of the people on my list. I just can't with them anymore.

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I am going to LA for a conference in July. Totally going to drop Seth a script I have been working for immediate feedback.


So. Parts of Houston are flooding. Again. :green:

I saw that on the news. I lived in Houston (Spring) for a few years and just remember it raining everyday.

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So my husband does some online gaming, but he has a day job. About a year ago, he made friends with this guy online and played almost every night with him, often staying up way too late and struggling to get up in the morning. I don't think he has a job, or at least a 9-5. With all the stuff going on with our son, he hasn't been online much for the last month, and apparently his buddy is mad at him for it.

 

Is this normal gamer bro behavior or doosh?

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I dont know that gamer bro, of course, but it sounds like the gamer bro is a DB.

 

As for struggling to wake or be present or available mentally etc for IRL things due to gaming binges, I have found that in my life (not necessarily me, btw) that is sometimes just a new shiny thing that is drawing attention. Distraction akin to a kid on Christmas morning. Although sometimes that consumption is an indicator of depression... escapism thru that fictional and interactive world. I dont know your husband, of course, but if you have concerns like that talk to him in as non-combative way as possible... at least initially. That might be difficult, I know, but its better than coming into the conversation like Wyatt Earp to Tombstone.

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Is this normal gamer bro behavior or doosh?

Those aren't always a separate things. But, yeah, I can't say based on the information. Is he just mad because your husband isn't playing? Do they have some kind of agreement? Is he mad because your husband was supposed to let him know something was going? If you're regularly hanging out with someone for a year and then disappear without a trace, I can see that upsetting someone. But it's all degrees and what's said.

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I dont know that gamer bro, of course, but it sounds like the gamer bro is a DB.

 

As for struggling to wake or be present or available mentally etc for IRL things due to gaming binges, I have found that in my life (not necessarily me, btw) that is sometimes just a new shiny thing that is drawing attention. Distraction akin to a kid on Christmas morning. Although sometimes that consumption is an indicator of depression... escapism thru that fictional and interactive world. I dont know your husband, of course, but if you have concerns like that talk to him in as non-combative way as possible... at least initially. That might be difficult, I know, but its better than coming into the conversation like Wyatt Earp to Tombstone.

I was actually getting ready to have a hard conversation with him about how his gaming was interfering with Life when all of this stuff with our son hit the fan, and he pretty much cut it off almost cold turkey. His buddy has irritated me for a long time, though, because he seemed especially needy and like his needs took priority. Not to mention the fact that there's no way this guy lives any semblance of a healthy adult life. My husband warned him that not only were we taking a vacation, but he had some family stuff going on that meant he wouldn't be around as much. So when my husband finally got back online for a night 4 weeks later, his buddy gave him the cold shoulder. I would say good riddance, but I'm pretty sure this guy will show up one day wanting his help and pretending like nothing happened. I've had friends IRL try to pull this nonsense so I have little tolerance for that kind of behavior. Own it when you're crappy or don't treat people badly. I guess I was more wondering if that level of neediness is normal in gamer culture.

 

We've lost a lot of close friends the past few years to moves, and my husband is an introvert so he hasn't really replaced those friends. He has a soccer team he really likes, so I'm cool with him having guys night every Wednesday after soccer, as long as he takes our son's contact out before he leaves (I can do it, but my son doesn't think I do as good of a job as dad so he fights me). And the guys seem like genuinely nice guys, so I'm glad he gets some social time once a week.

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That gamer bro is totally a DB then, no seems like or ifs or buts about it. I feel for you guys losing friends, if they were like that dude though maybe it was for the better. I dunno. Thats cool that your husband recognized a potential issue prior to there needing to be a chat between you two, though.

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Dude sounds like a dick. I don't really make rando friends when I play online, I only communicate withe people I know IRL when gaming.

 

I stayed up till 12.30 last night playing Mordhau. I intended on getting up earlier than normal to go to the gym before work..but its 8am now and too late to go. I don't like disappointing myself

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I wouldn't say I've ever been a huge gamer, especially with online multiplayer. I did get really into the Friday the 13th game, which was almost exclusively online. I never experienced any super needy people, and most were normal people. So I don't think it's part of normal gamer culture.

 

I've lost IRL friends because my life changed, though. I can't spend the same amount of time with them because I have a family that I would rather spend time with than hanging out at bars or playing board games all the time. I'm not against those things, but in moderation. Spending time with my kids is way more important and rewarding, not to mention spending time with my wife.

 

I have other friends who are completely single and understand completely. If I tell them that I want to hang out, they'll make sure it happens, even if my schedule doesn't work for months, which happens. They live almost an hour away, so it's hard to make it work regularly now that I also don't work in the same city.

 

Some people get jealous, especially when they don't have things going for them. They typically aren't worth the effort of comforting, because they'll always want more.

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I wish my F13 experience was like that. I loved that game-- but the inability to learn the maps and really get down the clunky power controls for Jason made it hard to ever get any good at. The first few times I played it, there were great people along for the ride, screams of fear, laughter-- it was great.

 

But pretty much every other time I've tried it's just annoying 16 year olds talking trash and making it impossible to play. "no-lifers" as my son calls them.

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Too bad the time zone difference made it impossible to play together. I experienced a little of that, but I would leave matches. Inevitably those kids would be in a group and if one of them was Jason, they'd work together. But I met some great people, and even some great kids. Taught a few how to play even.

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someday you cant teach me. I can NOT get the timing of Jason's super speed down. I always over-shoot.

 

Then there was the time I was chasing a camper around a rock FOREVER in circles, with rage building as I heard him laughing.

 

Whenever I play Jason I'm just clumsy and lumbering and can't get anyone. When I'm a camper, Jason just appears behind me and kills me.

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