3131 replies to this topic

[Ms. Spam]

When I was let go from Cicis Pizza as a manager they asked me to stay until the store that was closing was closed so my replacement (the guy who ran the store so bad it wasn't making a profit and was closing) could come and take over my position. I half assed that work. Lemme tell you. Bunch of redneck hicks with money and a good ole boy network. I basically chose the station I liked working and did that job and said NO to every other request. What are you going to do? Fire me? Dumbasses. Fortunately I had my teaching degree so I just want back to teaching but chose a charter school to get hired in instead of working public schools. I'm not half the burn out I was before.

 

This week moved fast. My friend who lost her baby had the funeral yesterday. I couldn't go because they had too many going from our school and they needed us to actually stay and make sure things didn't get crazy. I was okay with that. As the crazy cat lady I can't even imagine what it's like to lose your baby before it is even 9 months old at a day care. 

[Iceheart]

Heh, I'm moving fast on moving out... today I packed up the last of my personal belongings. Yesterday was backups/wiping my personal files from the computer. I'll be working in a sterile cube for the next "two weeks".

 

I took a personal day on Wednesday to get my head on straight, and help my dad's friend cuddle puppies (he's a doberman breeder) and trim cannabis plants (he's also a medical grower) in exchange for quite a lot of weed (valued at way more than I would have made just going to the office that day). Now that I'm in a position to walk away, I'll be using a few more personal days to be sure.

 

Funny story about those personal days  - January 2018 I had the worst fibromyalgia flare I've had since I started showing symptoms when I was 19. I couldn't even sit up for a solid week, and the initial injury plus the repetitive stress injury I ended up with as one leg tried to do double duty for months on end didn't even heal until September - that's nine months of constant pain, and I wasn't exactly thinking clearly for the first part of it... so I drained ALL of my PTO on taking that week off when I couldn't get out of bed, and no one bothered to ask if I wanted to use FMLA instead, nor was I in a place to know to ask for it myself. So, in all that pain, I had no time off at all from January to the end of June when my PTO bank refilled. I used like 2 days of that PTO, and then the company was acquired in September and I promptly lost my PTO again. I just got it back in January... and **** me if I don't take advantage of it after only getting 5 proper vacation days last year out of the 15 I should have had.

[Metropolis]

Sorry to hear about be laid off.

[Kyrian]

Damn, that sucks, Ice. Was there any real warning/indication that they were going to let the position go?

[3 & 6 years to go...]

I have done that before - training my replacement.  I did it to the best of my ability, thinking that the company will see my professionalism, and try to find me another position within the company.

 

[Iceheart]

Damn, that sucks, Ice. Was there any real warning/indication that they were going to let the position go?

 

In a hindsight being 20/20 way, but no, there wasn't any real writing on the wall.

 

 

I have done that before - training my replacement.  I did it to the best of my ability, thinking that the company will see my professionalism, and try to find me another position within the company.

 

 

Right?!? The company I worked for before this one strung me along with part-time fill-in gigs, and I was good enough to take the interim position in a pinch, and train the incoming person... for the job I interviewed for... but heaven forbid they actually hire me in full-time.

[Fozzie]

I've done it a couple of times. The worst was for a place where nobody even officially told me that they had hired someone else for the job. And then they wouldn't telle how long I would stay, so I ended up just leaving. I was in the job as a temp for a year and the permanent replacement lasted two months.

[Iceheart]

Corporations are ridiculous, man. You see all these articles on LinkedIn about "unicorn employees" and how valuable they are, but it's usually the unicorns that get the **** end of the stick.

[Kyrian]

I got turned down for promotion twice at my job before getting this current one, but they still used me to train new guys that were coming in to do the same job as me... Good enough to be one of the very few people to train the new generation of employees, but not good enough to reward me for my work? Right. OK.

[El Chalupacabra]

My Dad has been in the hospital with heart issues and pneumonia since Dec 6th, and has basically been bed-ridden so long, he cannot even stand up anymore.  Today, I have to go to visit him with my brother to try to convince him that even when he does get out of the hospital, we can no longer take care of him the way he needs, and he will have to get into assisted living of some type.  It will crush him, and it is one of the most difficult things I have ever had to do.    

[Odine]

Sorry bout your job, Ice. Thats ****.

Sorry bout your pops, Chalup. Is he long in the tooth?

[El Chalupacabra]

Thank you, Odine.  Well my Dad is older at 70, but he has had serious health issues for many years, including heart disease, and severe neuropathy.  It's almost as if he has the body of a 90+ year old.  He has been to the hospital many times since 2000, and I live close to help him out.  His health issues really have become much worse in recent years, especially since my Mom passed away in 2013. There is only so much the body can take, and I fear he may not make it through this time, and  if he does, he will likely have to go to a long term care facility after the hospital and rehab.  I had a nice talk with him and my brother, and it went better than I even hoped it would.  I think he sees these issues for himself, now.  That in of itself is a relief.  It is still a conversation that is very difficult to have with a loved one.  

[Fozzie]

I'm glad it went well, Chalup. That sounds awful, all around. If you need to vent or get emotional support, we're here for you.

[El Chalupacabra]

Thank you Fozzie.  Much appreciated that you say that.  Definitely will keep it in mind.  This has been a long time coming for my Dad, and his poor health is finally catching up to him.  I've tried my very best to be a good son to him, and my mom too, and have done everything I was capable of doing to help them out when and where I can.  But now, it's time to step back and for me to learn to accept there are some things I cannot do.  That is what is frustrating me the most. 

[Jacen123]

I'm really sorry to hear about this, Chalup.  I remember when this happened with my grandfather and I know it was tough on my mother, especially.  As Fozzie said, we're definitely here for you if/when you need some support and/or silly crap to try to take your mind off of things.

[El Chalupacabra]

Thank you Jacen.  Most kind of you!

[Tank]

Man, you guys are taking some lumps. Everyone stay strong, or at least know to ask for help when you cant.

[Destiny Skywalker]

Chalupa, make sure you talk to social work as soon as possible about this big life change. They can help so much!

I'm glad your dad was understanding. My mom was in denial until her hypoxic event and was so angry at us for "putting" her in a nursing home. In reality, it was the doctors who refused to discharge her to home. It will be hard and probably won't be fun, but there comes a point where it's too much on your own. Don't feel guilty, ok?

[El Chalupacabra]

I have been working with a case manager and a social worker, which is what prompted this conversation with my Dad in the first place.  They have been very helpful in informing me.  I am sorry your mom was angry, and that is what I was fearful of, too.  My Dad has a long way to go before he is even discharged from the hospital, let alone the post acute rehab, so there are a lot of unknowns as to what will happen after rehab.  But one thing is certain, he will need to get help either in home, or assisted living (my preference).   In AZ, there is a state equivalent to Social Security medicare called AHCCCS, for long term care coverage.   My dad makes too much for that, so before they start helping with coverage (or even to qualify), he will need to spend down his life savings.  But if he does go into assisted living, that won't take long.  Six months at the most.

[Iceheart]

I had a nice talk with him and my brother, and it went better than I even hoped it would.  I think he sees these issues for himself, now.  That in of itself is a relief.  It is still a conversation that is very difficult to have with a loved one.  

 

Oh, good. When my great-uncle had to go into a nursing home, he refused to let us, his POA, make any decisions for him, despite being pretty advanced in lewy body dementia but not having a formal diagnosis yet (so we couldn't override his decisions)... which meant he insisted in staying in two abusive situations, one a terrible nursing home that probably took a few years off his life, and the other being the "family friend" who had previously stolen $75K from him and only wanted custody of him for the social security checks. Handling the elder care legal system when you have an uncooperative elder is awful.  At least your dad sounds pretty clear-headed about it, and should either make good decisions, or let you make them for him.

[Cerina]

 

Damn, that sucks, Ice. Was there any real warning/indication that they were going to let the position go?

 

In a hindsight being 20/20 way, but no, there wasn't any real writing on the wall.

 

 

I have done that before - training my replacement.  I did it to the best of my ability, thinking that the company will see my professionalism, and try to find me another position within the company.

 

 

Right?!? The company I worked for before this one strung me along with part-time fill-in gigs, and I was good enough to take the interim position in a pinch, and train the incoming person... for the job I interviewed for... but heaven forbid they actually hire me in full-time.

 

This is actually how my mom got her current job. They wanted someone with an actual accounting degree to run their accounting, but she had been working there as a temp and essentially doing it. They tried a few people whom she trained, but they didn't work out for one reason or another. Finally they were just like, "ok, will you please just do this for us?"

 

My Dad has been in the hospital with heart issues and pneumonia since Dec 6th, and has basically been bed-ridden so long, he cannot even stand up anymore.  Today, I have to go to visit him with my brother to try to convince him that even when he does get out of the hospital, we can no longer take care of him the way he needs, and he will have to get into assisted living of some type.  It will crush him, and it is one of the most difficult things I have ever had to do.    

I'm really sorry.

We're facing something similar with my husband's grandmother. Except she pretty much hates me, so it isn't my problem so much as my mother-in-law's problem. But it's heart-wrenching and difficult for her. 

[Odine]

Thank you, Odine.  Well my Dad is older at 70, but he has had serious health issues for many years, including heart disease, and severe neuropathy.  It's almost as if he has the body of a 90+ year old.  He has been to the hospital many times since 2000, and I live close to help him out.  His health issues really have become much worse in recent years, especially since my Mom passed away in 2013. There is only so much the body can take, and I fear he may not make it through this time, and  if he does, he will likely have to go to a long term care facility after the hospital and rehab.  I had a nice talk with him and my brother, and it went better than I even hoped it would.  I think he sees these issues for himself, now.  That in of itself is a relief.  It is still a conversation that is very difficult to have with a loved one.  

Yeah that is a hard conversation. Good that he was receptive to it though. Care facilities can be pretty good these days, although great ones aren't cheap I'm told. I hope your old man pulls through and you've still plenty of time together. The body can only take so much, you're right, but you'd be surprised how amazing our vessels are. Oftentimes its the spirit that gives out first. "Kia Kaha" they say in Maori. "Stay strong".

Edited by Odine, 12 February 2019 - 01:07 AM.

[Darth Krawlie]

Welp, I'm down to just one grandparent now. My dad's mom, whom I was never close to, passed away last night. I'm fine, just worried about my dad.

[El Chalupacabra]

My condolences Krawlie, and I hope your Dad is OK. 

[Cashmere]

Man, adulting really sucks sometimes. So sorry to hear that things are rough for you and yours, Icy, Cerina, Chalup, and Krawlie.