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Which conspiracy theories are the most retarded?

jfk moon landing 9/11

80 replies to this topic

Poll: Which conspiracy theories are the most retarded? (23 member(s) have cast votes)

Which conspiracy theories are the most retarded?

  1. JFK (0 votes [0.00%])

    Percentage of vote: 0.00%

  2. Moon landing (7 votes [30.43%])

    Percentage of vote: 30.43%

  3. Voted 9/11 (9 votes [39.13%])

    Percentage of vote: 39.13%

  4. UFOs (1 votes [4.35%])

    Percentage of vote: 4.35%

  5. Jesus/God, Christians (1 votes [4.35%])

    Percentage of vote: 4.35%

  6. New World Order (1 votes [4.35%])

    Percentage of vote: 4.35%

  7. Elvis (3 votes [13.04%])

    Percentage of vote: 13.04%

  8. AIDS (1 votes [4.35%])

    Percentage of vote: 4.35%

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#1
Guest_Letsgo_7_7_*

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Poll

Which conspiracy theories are the most retarded? Vote in the poll.

Here are the choices, I'll add more upon suggestion:

-JFK assassination
-Moon landing hoax
-9/11 staged
-UFOs exist (Roswell, MiB, Majestic 12, etc.)
-Belief in Jesus or God
-New World Order (Illuminati, Bilderberg Group, Trilateral Commission, Black Helicopters, etc.)
-Elvis Presley is alive
-AIDS created by US government

#2
El Chalupacabra

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You need to clarify what JFK conspiracy you are talking about. I am assuming it is the grassy knoll conspiracy as seen in Oliver Stone's abortion of a film, JFK. Every time someone quotes that movie as if it were fact, I want to kick them, and Oliver Stone, in the nuts.

As to the rest, these are just degrees of retardation, but 9/11 being an inside job has got to be the worst. I mean, saying Bush is an imbecile yet master minded 9/11 is an oxymoron.

#3
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By JFK conspiracy, I mean any combination of theories that involve JFK being assassinated by anyone other than one person- Lee Harvey Oswald.

So, Grassy Knoll, more than one killer, Cubans, CIA, Mafia, Soviets, Clay Shaw, etc., all fit in that category.

#4
Tank

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I say this as a completely non-religious person... But Jesus is a conspiracy theory?

Also, can we say that there are levels of belief? Like, I can think aliens exist without thinking every blinking light in the sky is abducting people to anal probe.
  • Obsidian, Pong Messiah, Exodus and 2 others like this

#5
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No, cuz
  • JFK - was a conspiracy
  • Moon landing - WHY HAVENT WE GONE BACK?
  • UFOs - There is life elsewhere
  • Jesus/God, Christians - No that conspiracy worked
  • New World Order - they are consolidating power
  • Elvis - taken out by the mob
  • AIDS - contained by dustin hoffman
boom

only left off 9/11 cuz we all know the jews did 9/11
  • Darth Krawlie +1 this

#6
Pong Messiah

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Also, can we say that there are levels of belief? Like, I can think aliens exist without thinking every blinking light in the sky is abducting people to anal probe.

This is an important question. I really don't have a problem with somebody who says they think the government knew/knows more about 9/11 than the public -- how is that at all unreasonable? And heck, I don't even have a problem with the possibility that flight 93 was shot down... but don't act like you and your fellow believers somehow know, insisting that anybody who disagrees with you is either ignorant or in on it.

Same with aliens. I don't think the concept of extra-terrestrial life is at all far-fetched. In fact, I would be surprised if we end up finding nothing on Mars or Europa, but yeah -- taking it to the level of most UFO conspiracy theorists is stupidly insane.
  • Tank, Obsidian and Exodus +1 this

#7
the skiff guard

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Yeah Go-go, I think you need to clarify exactly what conspiracy theories you are referring to with your poll subjects

#8
Ms. Spam

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I gotta go with the Moon-landing is fake one. I think it's entirely believable that we can send a projectile with people to the moon. What do these nuts say about the International Space Station now?

#9
monkeygirl

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Yeah, moon landing for me, too. That would have been an obscene amount of money and resources used just to flip off the Russians.

#10
El Chalupacabra

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I say this as a completely non-religious person... But Jesus is a conspiracy theory?



Tank you are right that belief in a religion in of itself, namely Christianity, is not a conspiracy theory.

I misinterpreted that point, and just jumped to the conclusion LG was talking about something like the Shroud of Turin, Spear of Destiny, relics(as in body parts of saints) that were in truth pickled body parts, or other Dan Brown-ish theories.

Edited by El Chalupacabra, 03 June 2012 - 12:46 PM.


#11
Darth Krawlie

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Moon landing, just barely beating out the new world order nonsense. We all know the NWO just got too big, especially when they split into Wolfpack and Hollywood factions.

Posted Image
  • Tank, the skiff guard, Ms. Spam and 1 other +1 this

#12
Ms. Spam

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Dude. I new that nWo sounded wrestling like to me!

#13
Frexspar

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I think all conspiracy theories are awesome.
  • Copper +1 this

#14
The Kurgan

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Communist indoctrination, communist infiltration and the international communist conspiracy sapping and impurifying our precious bodily fluids.
  • Ryn and Obsidian +1 this

#15
Ms. Spam

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I've not heard that one, Kurgan.

I think the Red Scare was awesome though.

#16
Cerina

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I had to go with New World Order. This may be because I hear about it all day every day from the chick that I work with, so I think about it more than the others. (Not that she doesn't believe in almost everything else in the list as well. Well, except Jesus.) I think at least twice a week I get to hear about some other celebrity was inducted into the Illuminati during a public appearance of some kind or another.

This is the same girl who is currently prepping for the zombie apocalypse that started last weekend.

#17
ShadowDog

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This is a retarded assed collection of conspiracies right here. It was hard to pick which one was the tardest.

Also, once again I oddly find myself agreeing with Pongy. There's little doubt in my mind that Flight 93 was shot down even as the passengers retook the plane ... but what was the government supposed to do when they didn't know what was going down inside? LET A 4TH PLANE CRASH INTO A BUILDING? Of course not! It had to be done, tragedy that it was.

#18
Destiny Skywalker

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Moon landing pisses me off, just slightly more than those nutbags who claim that nothing crashed into the Pentagon.

#19
Pong Messiah

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Can you debunk the Pentagon one, Destiny?

#20
The Kurgan

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I've not heard that one, Kurgan.

I think the Red Scare was awesome though.


"You know when fluoridation first began? Nineteen hundred and forty-six. 1946, Mandrake. How does that coincide with your post-war Commie conspiracy, huh? It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hard-core Commie works. Well, I, uh... I... I... first became aware of it, Mandrake, during the physical act of love. Yes, a uh, a profound sense of fatigue... a feeling of emptiness followed. Luckily I... I was able to interpret these feelings correctly. Loss of essence. I can assure you it has not recurred, Mandrake. Women uh... women sense my power and they seek the life essence. I, uh... I do not avoid women, Mandrake. But I... I do deny them my essence."


#21
Destiny Skywalker

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Can you debunk the Pentagon one, Destiny?

There's a security camera video. Something big and fast hit it. Let's see what else it could be.

#22
Pong Messiah

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There's a security camera video. Something big and fast hit it. Let's see what else it could be.

According to the conspiracy theorists... a big missile! Plus, what about the lack of wreckage? Anything to those claims?

#23
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Yeah Go-go, I think you need to clarify exactly what conspiracy theories you are referring to with your poll subjects


You guys are overthinking the question. I'm talking about the standard, mainstream, well known theories associated with each subject. I put some terms in the parantheses next to each subject, I would've thought this was enough to clarify. So for UFOs, note that I put ("Roswell, MiB, Majestic 12, etc."), from that I think it's pretty clear that I'm getting at the various government cover-up theories around a UFO encounter, not the mere belief that aliens could exist somewhere in the universe. Don't know why this is so difficult for you guys.

I say this as a completely non-religious person... But Jesus is a conspiracy theory?


I put that in there more as a joke than anything else Tank. Belief in Jesus or God is, to be fair, not really a conspiracy theory.. it's more akin to a mental illness or persistant delusion.

Like, I can think aliens exist without thinking every blinking light in the sky is abducting people to anal probe.


Sure, I guess you can. You can believe whatever you want to believe with no evidence whatsoever. We have a word for these people: crazy.

There's little doubt in my mind that Flight 93 was shot down even as the passengers retook the plane ... but what was the government supposed to do when they didn't know what was going down inside?


You have GOT to be kidding me. I always thought you were just spectacularly un-funny, SD. Now I see that you are spectacularly un-funny and retarded.


Finally- Chalup, it's "esque" not "esk." Thanks.

#24
Frexspar

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Get out your Letsgo Bitchy Bingo Cards, kids. You can mark off 3 squares so far today: "Calling Someone Crazy", "Correcting Someone's Use of a Word", and "Calling Someone Retarded". I just need, "Calling Someone Irrelevant" and "Bragging About How Rich She Is" and I win.
  • the skiff guard, Destiny Skywalker, Obsidian and 8 others like this

#25
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Oh, Frex. I don't have a good response.

I'll admit it, that was actually kinda clever.



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