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WHY DID CLOSE BASTDOORS?


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Just like your mom

This is the thread that doesn't end Yes, it goes on and on, my friend Some people started posting in it not knowing what it was And they'll continue posting in it forever just because This is the thre

I like how we all tried to "out-tard" one another in the way we typed the line you mentioned.   My favorite post, however, was by the guy who rewrote it as an actual thought-provoking essay.

quote:

Originally posted by Blade Runner:

[QB] "Airplane 2" you jarheads!

 

Classic bad movie with my man Shatner! (hence the pic I posted?!?!?!?!?)

I thought I rememebrered Shatner! (He's pretty good-natured about those things). I couldn't tell that was him in that picture. No toupe.

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I'll do you one better and say Star Wars itself:

public class Princess implements ExecutorService {

public static final Princess PADME = new Princess();

 

// private member

private StarShip ship;

 

private Princess() {

this.setDefaultLocale(Locale.EN);

Timer timer = new Timer();

TimerTask task = new TimerTask() {

public void run() {

Princess.this.changeHairStyle();

Princess.this.changeClothes();

}

};

timer.scheduleAtFixedRate(task, new Date(), 1000);

}

}

 

public class JediKnight implements ExecutorService {

public static final JediKnight ANAKIN = new JediKnight(false);

public static final JediKnight OBI_WAN = new JediKnight(false);

public static final JediKnight YODA = new JediKnight(true);

 

private JediKnight(boolean isYoda) {

if (!isYoda) {

this.setDefaultLocale(Locale.EN);

}

else {

Locale yodaLocale = Locale.EN;

this.setDefaultLocale(Utils.shuffle(yodaLocale));

}

this.setLightSabre(LightSabreFactory.getInstance());

this.setGoodLooking(!isYoda);

}

}

 

public class Sith {

public static final Sith LORD = new Sith();

 

private Sith() {

this.setDefaultLocale(Locale.EN);

this.setClothes(DarkRobeFactory.getInstance());

this.setLightSabre(LightSabreFactory.getInstance());

}

}

 

public static main() {

// The following line has been commented out so as not

// to confuse fans who never did it

 

// Utils.initChildren(JediKnight.ANAKIN, Princess.PADME);

 

// Use JDK 5.0 concurrency package

Future<Set<Child>> padmeFuture = Princess.PADME.submit(

new Callable<Set<Child>>() {

public Set<Child> call() {

try {

int weeks = (int)(36+4.0*Math.random());

wait(weeks*7*24*60*60*1000);

this = null;

System.gc();

}

finally() {

Child boy = new Child("Luke");

Child girl = new Child("Leia");

Set<Child> result = new HashSet<Child>();

result.add(boy);

result.add(girl);

return result;

}

}

}

);

 

if (JediKnight.ANAKIN.poll(padmeFuture) instanceof ThreadDeath) {

JediKnight.ANAKIN.alarm();

 

// use some marketing ideas

Sith.LORD.promise(JediKnight.ANAKIN, new RuntimePermission("object.restore.afterGC"));

Sith.LORD.promise(JediKnight.ANAKIN, new RuntimePermission("force.power.dark.*"));

Sith.LORD.promise(JediKnight.ANAKIN, new RuntimePermission("force.power.*"));

Sith.LORD.promise(JediKnight.ANAKIN, new RuntimePermission("force.*"));

 

JediKnight.ANAKIN.setInternalName("Darth Vader");

 

JediKnight.ANAKIN.promise(Princess.PADME, new RuntimePermission("*"));

 

Princess.PADME.alarm();

Princess.PADME.boardShip();

 

// Use JDK 5.0 concurrency package

Future<StarShip> anakinFuture =

JediKnight.OBI_WAN.submit(

new Callable<StarShip>() {

public RuntimePermission call() {

try {

Class princessClass = Princess.getClass();

Field shipField = princessClass.getDeclaredField("ship");

// will never throw SecurityException on Jedi Knight

shipField.setAccessible(true);

JediKnight.this.add(new RuntimePermission("object.ship.board.*"));

return (StarShip)shipField.get(Princess.PADME);

}

catch (SecurityException se) {

// never supposed to happen to Jedi Knight

System.out.println("Internal error. Contact George Lucas.");

System.reboot();

}

}

}

);

 

StarShip padmeShip = anakinFuture.call();

padmeShip.put(JediKnight.OBI_WAN);

 

JediKnight.ANAKIN.see(Princess.PADME);

Princess.PADME.removeLove(JediKnight.ANAKIN);

 

JediKnight.ANAKIN.see(JediKnight.OBI_WAN);

JediKnight.ANAKIN.removeLove(Princess.PADME);

 

JediKnight.OBI_WAN.removeLimbs(JediKnight.ANAKIN);

// note - absolutely no need for GC, Anakin will be collected automatically.

 

ReferenceQueue<JediKnight> sithWatchList = new ReferenceQueue<JediKnight>();

PhantomReference<JediKnight> anakinRef = sithWatchList.remove();

JediKnight anakinPhantom = anakinRef.get();

 

Sith DARTH_VADER = Sith.LORD.assemble(anakinPhantom, LimbFactory.getSpareInstances());

MouthPiece newMouthPiece = MouthPieceFactory.getInstance();

// no need to check that it works - guaranteed to work with no noise

DARTH_VADER.add(newMouthPiece);

DARTH_VADER.rise();

}

else {

// TODO - create alternative scenario for Sith revenge

}

}

 

how can any mother-loving person close on that?

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quote:

I just want to say that I have been posting at Nightly for 6 years, and RARELY has a thread I started made it to page three. Thanks guys.

I realise you original question was rhetorical... but I think it is also a record that the thread has reached page 3 without the original question having an answer attempted in any of it's replies.

 

So:

 

WHY DID CLOSE BASTDOORS?

 

I don't fecking know!

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