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Destiny Skywalker

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Everything posted by Destiny Skywalker

  1. That's a pretty short commute, both for time and mileage. Doesn't seem worth having a commuter car.
  2. Holy shit, how much do you think you sunk into that place? Do you have receipts you could take her to small claims court or something? We are getting ready to do a kitchen/bath remodel downstairs. We have a half bath downstairs, and we have a laundry room with a giant hallway and you have to go through the laundry room via the hallways to get into our back room/den. It's currently where my husband hangs out playing video games or watching TV most evenings. It's also our guest room and has a wallbed. We're going to get rid of the hallway and move the laundry to where the bathroom is now, create a mudroom, and add a shower so that downstairs has more of a 2nd master suite. This is in case my dad has to move in with us and it will just make a nicer guest room. We are also going to get a small desk to put in there because pandemic promises did not happen (my husband thought they were going to let him wfh forever because he was super productive, hah!) and we do not need a dedicated office with a giant corner desk that is actually hard to get into. We will probably move the treadmill into the office and let the kids use that room to put their toys and crap so they stop dragging them all over the house. For the kitchen, we are going to gut it and rip out the center island because it's so crowded you can't open the fridge/freezer without standing to the side or unload the dishwasher and put dishes away in the cabinets on the island. We are going to add a bar and cabinets on the other side. My husband also wants this built in bench and table that I think is unnecessary, but sure more seating is good. This means changing the entrance to the backyard as well. We dreamed of having 2 big sliders coming out of the parlor, but the contractor is really hesitant because he doesn't know what the header looks like on that wall without essentially ripping into the wall. If they can't do it we are going to have to redo the whole bench seating thing.
  3. How far do you commute to work? For us it's RV vs vacation home. Can't do both. We started talking about retirement and my husband thinks he wants to travel like his mom always said she would. I told him we need to massively downsize once the kids are at college and find a crash pad type place (hence the vacation home idea), or go full ex-pat and see if our company will transfer us to Europe the last few years before we retire and we just stay there and fly back to the US a few times a year to see the kids and their families (or heck they can come with, the US ain't that great). His mom moved to Florida intending to travel to Europe all the time, but instead dumped all of her money into her house, which is a shit ton of upkeep because it's way too big for her, got a bunch of pets that require boarding when she travels, and keeps having to put up hurricane shutters. So I think your RV idea sounds like a good one! Retire right.
  4. Got Q's ski gear today. They gave us the same Rossignol Experience Pros she had 2 years ago that she loved so much lol. But this time I didn't get the premium package because now they're older. They did tell me that they use skis for multiple years but they replace bindings every year. That's good to know and will probably make me continue to shop there. She's on 128s which I think are a touch short (she's 4'10 now). And we have the same boot size.
  5. Yeah I think parenting is a lot easier to preach than practice. This morning I was trying not to lose my shit with my kids while they ran all over the house, grabbing shit, not doing what I asked so we could get out of the house to go to a soccer game. I told them I couldn't handle them being so chaotic. They were having a great time and just kept amping themselves up even further. By the time we got in the car I was beyond irritated and snippy. I think depending on the family, having another family member step in is not the right choice. If you've grown up in a home with generational trauma, the other people are probably making the same mistakes that led to this situation in the first place. I don't have siblings or nephews/nieces, though, so I will probably never be in the situation. But I had to ask our friends if they would take our kids if something happened to us. There's no way I'm letting my in laws screw up my kids. I'm pretty sure my well-meaning but old school dad would mess up my daughter. We've just had so many horror stories out here about kids who should've been taken away from their parents who have ended up murdered. So I admittedly lean on the side of foster care is safer. We've had a few families who have gotten railroaded by the system but the kids were always safe in foster care, it was just that people didn't deserve to have their kids taken away (it's usually been because of medical reasons where the kid had a weird disease and a doctor mistakes it for abuse).
  6. We got the F150 with the intent to haul a midsize RV and of course now we are rethinking it lol. I do have to step up to get into it but there are running boards so it's not bad (honestly might be easier than getting into my old Toyota Highlander). Are you actually going to use the pickup bed? I mean some of the SUVs have pretty good towing capacity and generally get better gas mileage. Admittedly right now we mostly treat ours like a big SUV. It is nice to have a roomy car again. I love my car for a daily driver and for skiing but it's way too small when all 4 of us are in it. We love the truck for road trips but man that gas mileage sucks.
  7. Might also be a sign of constant constipation from withholding. Ask me how I know, sigh. (Although this was pre-K, not 2nd grade, thank God.) But in this case I'm worried that the withholding behavior is something trauma based for that poor girl. I know a fair few foster parents. They are good people. Are there really that many bad ones?
  8. My experience is that Ford is awful to work with. Seriously the worst sales experience we've ever had. We intentionally saved cash from our home sale (awesome interest rate on the new home) in order to pay cash for the truck. I hate car loans, they are the worst.
  9. God please get those poor kids out of that house. I feel bad for both of those kids. I know sometimes the behavior issues are not the parent's fault, but in this case there is clear signs of neglect that are most likely contributing factors.
  10. I'm so glad my kids still like showers/baths but Q is starting to get a little gnarly. She showers every night but forgets to wash her hair some nights. I am not looking forward to when E needs to start wearing deodorant. Ok, any of you have experience with acne? Q is starting to get some on her forehead. What products should she use? I did not have acne so I am clueless on how to help her. I think we are quitting Cub Scouts. E is just not into it and Webelos is so outdoor focused which is not his jam. Bears was fine because there was a lot of opportunity to be creative. And there's just too much talking at meetings. The adult leaders are so nice and so supportive, but its not his thing. He asked if he can keep selling popcorn, though. That has been his favorite thing to do in Cub Scouts. His pack is currently in the top 10 nationwide for sales and 2 of the boys are 7 and 8th nationwide (both are over $20k).
  11. We got a 2021 F-150 Platinum for less than that... a year ago. That Maverick was a bad deal.
  12. I'm always amazed when that happens. My in-laws once left on vacation and realized their kid didn't have shoes. But they're so neurotic they called the podiatrist to make sure it would be ok to just buy him regular shoes somewhere or if they had to drive hours back home to get his orthotics. (He does not have a serious foot abnormality, hence why I think it was overkill.) Last time we made one pot Mac n cheese. I let the girls pick the menu for the one dinner and breakfast we have to prepare on our own. I had planned on suggesting walking tacos. Guess not! In the past we've done spaghetti, as well. All of Saturday is usually taken care of by a camp cook team in a mess hall. I do NOT cater to picky eaters there. Some of the troop leaders will contact the kitchen because one kid doesn't like strawberries. Look, that's probably not on the menu and it wasn't an allergy, just a dislike. One of our moms who is a professional chef once ran it for us and said never again because of what ***holes the adults were about their picky eaters. She absolutely accomodates to true allergies and vegetarians, but the gluten-free thing was very difficult and so are vegans. She told me that we should just be telling those kids that they need to bring their own food because you cannot mass prepare vegan/gluten free for 100+ people on the budget we have. But also the picky eaters were over the top.
  13. I just sent home 4 11 year old girls from a sleepover. We took them to play laser tag and to a Mexican restaurant. 3 of them ordered chicken nuggets and even that took a lot of convincing because they had never had THOSE chicken nuggets before. One was distraught that there were no mozzarella sticks on the menu. The other one told me she had never HAD a taco before. They picked at the chicken nuggets. I am taking both of them camping in 3 weeks. Heaven help me. I will never complain about my son being a picky eater ever again. He at least will try pizza or a burger ANYWHERE.
  14. You wanna adopt me, Tami? My kids need a cool grandma.
  15. I'm actually digging this a lot, but I've always really enjoyed the Jedi stories. Except for when they made Luke Skywalker a hack. Forget that noise.
  16. I went to Q's curriculum night tonight. Her teacher held me back to tell me how wonderful she is doing and how she is one of the kindest kids in the class, wise beyond her years. She is respectful and follows established boundaries. This is the kid I know. I'm glad she has this teacher who sees her heart. She also said she would love to have Q on Student Council because she is the sponsor. That said I arrived to curriculum night pissed off because of more mean girl antics today that had Q crying in the bathroom and an adult sent her to the office for support after seeing her emerge from thr bathroom still in tears. The principal tried to tell her that these girls say they want to be her friend still, but their actions indicate otherwise. I fired off an email to the counselor because she was out today but also to document so that no one can be shocked when I file a report with the district Harassment, Intimidation and Bullying office.
  17. E was on guanfacine and we just switched him to Strattera because guanfacine hasn't done much, and once when we accidentally bumped his dose, it was a disaster. He did well on Strattera in the past, but he couldn't swallow pills and the insides are horribly bitter (my husband accidentally got a little on his fingers once and said it was awful and he got why E was refusing to take it), so we switched to guanfacine. That said, we might need to increase the Strattera because he is on the lowest dose. We also tried clonodine and OMG, that was a mistake. I'm glad you said it out loud about restorative practices not working for bullying. Our school counselor thinks that's the answer to everything. She also excuses some of it because Q is just not on the same page socially. And honestly, I'm ok with that. I'd rather her be a little weird than mean. But it makes me sad that we protect the mean girls better than the supposedly less socially adept. The mean girl stuff on the soccer team is 100% learning from mom. It took me about a month that I wanted nothing to do with about half the families. They are mean shit-talkers who speak poorly about everyone else. No thanks, I'll hang out over here.
  18. We're not doing so great over here. E is on waitlist after waitlist. We were told likely another 9 months for an autism evaluation. Waiting until December to see the urologist. And I had to fight with the genetic counseling folks because they wanted us to fork out $4k for testing after insurance said they wouldn't cover it unless he was hospitalized. (They did agree to cover 2 other tests, though, but I had to fight the hospital to get them to agree to salad and the main course instead of the buffet they wanted.) He is getting a lot less paraeducator help this year, and I think people are getting frustrated at his attention span, but I can't do much about that. I just want some answers for him. I'm becoming increasingly concerned that we may be looking at an intellectual disorder, not just a developmental disorder. Q is having trouble with friends at school. The friends she had last year ditched her after 2 of the girls left to attend private school (one of them is at her former school). Turns out 1 of those girls really liked her and made the other girls knock off the mean girl antics. One of the girls came to school the 2nd day and announced she was no longer allowed to be friends with Q because her mom said she was a "bad influence". I'd like to know what drugs they caught Q in the parking lot with. I didn't tolerate this stuff when I was a tween, and I have even less patience for it now. Half the girls on her soccer team are somehow even meaner than last year's girls. Like the poor sportsmanship is simply astounding. And they aren't even that good. (They did stomp her old team 6-1 this summer in a tournament. That was pretty satisfying.) They are good athletes but not good soccer players, and they really just care about winning. And they are telling her they are losing because of her when really it's the entire team is making mistakes. So I think it's time to consider less serious teams where she can have fun and the focus is not only on winning but enjoying the sport. (Cue for Ender and I: insert rant on pay-to-play here.) We've offered to let her quit entirely but she said she wants to play soccer (and there are no other teams with openings until May). The sole saving graces right now are her new choir group and Girl Scouts starting up again. This age is just so terrible. I hate mean girls.
  19. I ended that episode telling myself, "If the people on Nightly didn't like that one, they have no soul."
  20. I think she was in the World Between Worlds because Jacen heard the lightsabers.
  21. I'm very sorry to hear about the loss of Helen, too. Sometimes losing close friends is just as hard as losing family.
  22. Nah, don't think I'm upgrading anything this year. Q and I are skipping lessons this year and just having fun. I downgraded to Night ski passes (after 2pm) because I didn't feel like we used the day passes very often. This year she has no weekend soccer games from Christmas to end of February, so I want to get in a lot of Friday nights and Saturdays. Thanks to you, though, I made a fitting appointment at Play it Again on opening day, Oct 1st. Q gonna have the good stuff.
  23. Maybe I'm the only one, but personally I loved the last episode. I don't even mind the background politics stuff. That's the tie to the ST, it's setting up the failure of the New Republic and exactly why Leia started to get out of politics. She saw the threat that still existed. I'm able to follow even though I haven't seen every episode of Clone Wars, and honestly, most of Rebels. Granted I've been a SW fan for most of my life. Is the target audience really casual fans? I mean, my dad would have no frigging idea what's going on, but my husband is following along for the most part. Side note: my daughter's therapist asked me to introduce her to Ahsoka through The Clone Wars. She thinks she needs a fictional role model and said when she was watching Clone Wars this weekend with her own kids, she realized Q reminded her so much of Ahsoka.
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