GreenLightBaby

Oh Sweet! I've been passing over this thread because I thought it was just a random comment and not more goodness. Do you mind maybe making this a new thread in the main forum and then maybe linking back here so more people will know what is going on? Or maybe I'm the only dunce, I dunno.

I'm sneaky. I'll post it in main forum when I get an idea for the next part. Just a little something for my muse to work on before NaNoWriMo. Just a quick twenty minute exercise. These two characters are mysterious even to me. Still won't tell me their names. I think they're just waiting to sneak up on me. This is a fun one because I have no plot, no backstory, nothing except the opening scene.

He was adamant for the the second part and she quickly zinged back with the third part. He's taking a little longer to tell me what happens. She's a sly one. A little prey and predator action with both of them playing both.

The opening scene's based on a Burn Notice episode where Mike's trying to find the sniper's perch. He found the room with the long table across from an open window. Easier to hide that way.

Pushing open the door to the 21^st floor, I glanced back to the stream of humanity hoofing down the stairs. I smiled knowing that security was too busy evacing the hotel to pay attention to one person.

Good news for me.

Bad news -- him.

"Why now? Why him?" I hugged his jacket and smelled him again. Slightly woodsy and all masculine.

The voice had mysteriously quieted as I felt him surrounding me. The darkness chased away by his strength. "My protector. My warrior."

His lapel flag knocked against the jammer in my left pocket, jarring me back into reality. I frowned as I snapped back into mission mode.

The shadows crept close. The quiet disturbed by the murmurings. The walls dropped around my heart.

Whipping off his jacket, I dropped the robe in a nearby housekeeping cart. I stared at his jacket, but I couldn't get rid of it.

"Leverage," I muttered not even believing in the lie.

Before I could think more of him, I pushed into the stairwell blending into the throng. Just a businesswoman dressed for a meeting.

Fingering his jacket, I smiled knowing he was coming for me and I couldn't wait.

"Alpha Team, be advised that shot came from your northwest corner of your floor."

I slowed then looked back. "Alpha 1 to Alpha 3, do you see a woman in a white robe wearing my jacket?"

"Alpha 3 to Alpha 1, that's a negative."

The hallway was clear. "Alpha 1 to Alpha 3, she should have passed you already."

"Alpha 3 to Alpha 1, negative. The stairway has been clear for a minute. Are you sure you sent her this way?"

I rushed back to her room. "Alpha 1 to Comm 1, do you have my location?"

"Comm 1 to Alpha 1, primary location is 23^rd floor, northwest corner. Secondary location is a negative."

"Son of a bitch!" I slammed my right hand against the wall next to me. "The woman."

"Comm 1 to Alpha 1, what woman?"

I pulled against the loop in my tie loosening it. "Alpha 1 to all teams. Clear this channel. Repeat clear this channel except for Comm. All teams go to secondary channels now."

I glared at the doorknob as I flipped my tie over my right shoulder. "Comm 1, I think I may have a suspect. Wait for my confirmation."

"Alpha 1, awaiting orders."

I fingered my Glock as I pushed the door open. "Cinnamon apple spice... just like her."

"Comm 1, room 2343. I found the sniper's perch. Table set up about five feet from the window. Sniper rifle still here. Send up the crew."

"Alpha 1, team dispatched. Do we have a suspect?"

I glanced around the room taking in her smell. I shook my head in disbelief. "Comm 1, give me a minute."

I hit the mute button as I slumped against the wall. "First woman I've been interested in a year and damn her for being the wrong one."

I flipped my tie back and smelled her again. "How the hell am I going to explain this? It can't be you."

i have a feeling this writer could start out writing bambi and end up with apocalypse now 2: the forest years. 'i love the smell of burning bunnies in the morning!"

Maybe you should write this for NaNoWriMo. If I did it, well it's not going to take me 50,000 words to end the story. More like a really short story.

Excuse my lateness in reading this as I have been sick. I enjoyed it as always and reading your comments just now I have to say I think you made the right choices as far as what you include and how to go about it. It's kind of like when Indiana Jones is making his way across the trick floor - one false move and the whole thing comes apart. But you made it across the room safely.

I hope you're feeling better Sonny.

It really is like a tightrope over a chasm sometimes. How to balance the action and emotion is harder in this entry. Also, what to take out, what to add and what to let go. I debated a long time about the chase sequence with the POV. Like I said, the original was in 3rd person omniscient. I could have done it using Dee's POV, but she couldn't see what was going around her since she was focused on the driving.

Thanks for the comments. Thunderstorms kicked the internet off the other night when I was trying to reply.

Yikes! I didn't think you'd do that... but you did! Very powerful and heart-wrenching in the final section

I wrote a NaNoNovel version of the first part about 5 years ago.

I guess the foreshadowing didn't help? To be honest, I didn't even pick up on it until I read it after I posted it. Subconsciously, I did. Evil muse. Baby carriage, minivan, ice cream truck and school bus.

I wrote the second part for this contest. During NaNo, I couldn't see this scene in my mind so I skipped it. These contests have helped me flesh out some scenes I couldn't write or edit the scenes to make them better.

this is my new favorite from you. the conversations felt very real to me. not saying your other conversations are fake but they are more stylized. more actiony. these felt gritty and very real. nice job!

That's because what's happening directly affects them. This time, **** hits the fan. In the other ones, they were in mission mode and had their crap together.

In the original draft, I chose more of an 3rd person omniscient POV that had the tac radio communications and more plot points. I had to ditch a lot of it especially a lot longer conversation before the action heats up.

In the first part, I intentionally picked Alex's POV. He had the most to lose and it's more action oriented. For the second part, I used Dee's POV. This section is more emotional so I picked her POV.

I debated only posting one part only, but divided it couldn't stand alone. Cliffhanger ending for the first part. Too much backstory dumping for the second part.

I took out the tac radio stuff because of the POV change. Took me a long time to figure out how to 'hear' the conversations so I went with their reactions. I think it reads a lot better.

The first section, even though it was a previous draft, it was hell to pull apart and piece together. There were so many plot points I had to discard because then I'd have to do a lot of backstory dumping. The tac radio parts were the worse to eliminate.

In regards to Mac... he was a throwaway name in a throwaway sentence when I was brainstorming. When Dee asks, "What about Mac?" in reply to Jenny telling her that her boyfriends were investigated thoroughly. Hell, I didn't know either. Then I let him do a walk on. Just a few quick lines and damn he totally stole the scene. Very insistent character and he got the next NaNoNovel and boy is that a doozy. Still unfinished, but damn intriguing. Mac's gone through hell and back more than once.

Yes, I torture my characters before they get their endings. Fun that way.

GAH. I read really fast because I wanted to figure out what the family was and why they were being targeted. Political or royal family was my first thought, then like X-Men style mutants, maybe? Or a combination? Damn it GLB, you have to tell me, or I'll go nuts!

 

Great yet sad story, btw But I must demand more

Husband's the head of a security firm/covert government group. They do what others can't without repercussions. Anything from providing security to spying. They've got a lot of enemies.

A lot of my contest entries have these characters and secondary ones too. Too bad they are so out of order even I can't figure it out sometimes. Zero Hour is the one off the top of my head that doesn't have Mac, Dee, Alex, Travis, Scott or Kathy. Zero Hour and The Darkness go together.

Echoes is a version of what could happen to Mac, Dee and Alex.

You want more... did you see this one? Out of the Blue How Mac Met Dee. ROFL.

Original unfinished fanfic I base my world on. Some characters grew into their own. Geocities is gone so this is from the Wayback Machine archive.Group X: Sub Rosa Just replace delly with Dee. I really need to finish. It's about ten years old so my style isn't as polished as it is now. I still have a long way learning craft.

This was awesome GLB. Great ending to a really ****ty week for me. Nixie has been raving to me about it and I wasn't disappointed.

I'm glad you liked it.

This was ****ing awesome. I loved the whole whithering glance thing. I always forget to include that kind of detail.

I forget too especially if I'm pressed for time. When the actions slower, I do put more detail. When the action's going, then I don't because it reads slow.

I kept on guessing too, but I had a feeling you'd go with that ending. I was thinking Simon was either FBI or a PI looking for the guy his wife's having an affair with. Nice twist.

A Jack-Booted-Thug

I liked Rachel's POV since she's pretty observant for her age. Great job. Sometimes it's hard for me to write in the POV of a child. Haven't been one in a very long time.

The ending clinches it. Using the imagery and dialogue, I could see this in my mind. Great job.

I'm not familiar with Morningside so I watched it on Youtube. I'm glad you didn't mention this in the beginning because it would have less of an impact.

St. Clair Avenue

10:13 AM

"Honey, you're too close. Move back," nagged Alex for the third time in ten minutes.

Slowing down at the yellow light, Dee rolled her eyes. "Next you're gonna tell me to put my feet up because they're swelling."

He pointed to the curb. "Are they? Pull over then."

She looked at the rearview mirror. "See he's so overprotective, Jenny."

"Little sister, they all get like that."

He placed a protective hand over her still flat belly. "Damn straight. Gotta protect our two little ones. They are moving so much."

"Be thankful. Later when the diapers and midnight crying starts he's going to be crying too." Jenny checked her sleeping son secured in his car seat. "He's always like this when we drive around."

"Still? He's like what… five?" Alex sat back up and looked over his left shoulder.

"Five in three months."

Alex's earpiece demanded his attention. Cocking his head, "Yes, Tex, we're on our way. We uh… had to make a side trip. Yeah they're fine."

Alex looked back. "Tex says he loves you and Jimmy."

"Send him my love."

"Tex, she sends her love. We're fine." He looked at Dee. "Dee was hungry so we stopped for ice cream."

Jenny noticed that Alex hadn't said a word for a while. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"He says he's got a feeling something's going to happen. He's sending backup. They'll rendezvous with us in ten minutes."

"He's always worrying."

"You think, big sister? Bet it was those death threats." She looked over at Alex. "Tell him we're going to be there by then."

"Nothing new," Jenny replied nonchalantly. There were always death threats.

"Right… just like the one this -- never mind."

"You're keeping this from me?"

She looked into the rearview mirror. "Protection. In this case, it's the younger taking care of the older."

"It's still the other way around."

"Remember when you asked me where I think I would be in five years? I never thought I'd be here."

"Yeah. I told you Mac would never be here." The venom was still in her voice even after these years.

"Why the hell did you bring him up? She slammed the top of the steering wheel then gripped it tightly at the three and nine positions.

"You were young. You fell in love. He breaks it off three months before you were to be married. No reason for running off like that. Two years go by and you met Alex. You both fell in love. Got married. Now you're having twins. Fair exchange I think."

Alex looked at his wife, seeing unshed tears. "Jenny, drop it. You keep reminding her of what she lost."

He touched her cheek. "Let me drive, honey."

"Hell no! It's my job and I can do it better than you."

He smiled inwardly knowing that her game face was on. "Then let's get to that safehouse."

"Let Alex drive." Jenny checked that his seatbelt straps. Secured.

Dee glanced at Alex. "Sis, why are you so jumpy?"

"Alex, take over driving now!" Jenny turned around to look at the cars behind them.

"Sis, we're almost there -- should have been if we hadn't stopped."

"Are we being tailed?" Alex looked around. Still nothing unusual. Nothing for miles.

"Alex, please…"

Something was warning him now. "Honey, pull over at the intersection coming up."

"This isn't right."

"Tex, where's our backup?" Dee cocked her head as she scanned the cars in front of them. "We're still eight minutes out. Dammit. Keep hitting red lights. No tails. Jenny just has a bad feeling about this."

"We're not stopping. We got to keep on moving otherwise we're going to be a sitting duck." Alex scanned behind them. That bad feeling went to worst.

Dee pulled out her earpiece and held it up. "He's freaking out. He wants to talk to you."

Jenny shoved it into her ear. "Tex, you got to get backup here. Now! This is bad… that dream I told you this morning… listen to me --"

Jenny saw something familiar "Turn right now!"

"It's one way," Dee shot back.

"Jenny, calm down. No one's following us." Dee scanned ahead, but saw nothing unusual.

"Tex, come in. Jenny, do you hear Tex?" Alex changed frequencies. "It's dead."

Bullets ripped across the hood from the right.

"****! Hang on!" Dee drove across the double yellow line into oncoming traffic. Cars swerved out of the way.

She turned onto a side street barely missing a woman pushing a baby carriage.

Alex pulled out his weapon and fired at the black dark-tinted van emerging from a business service entrance.

Dee pushed the green button on the steering wheel. The compartments on the backs of the front seats revealed two fully loaded semiautomatic guns.

"You know I hate guns them!"

"Sis, you know how to use them. If someone takes us out, you have to protect Jimmy and yourself. Fire first. Questions later. Understand?"

Alex punched several numbers on his cell phone. "****. Jammed."

Jenny stared at the weapon within her reach. "****." She grabbed the one in front of her.

Quickly releasing the clip, she checked the ammo. Full. She shoved it back into the handle and took off the safety.

"When's the last time you went to the target practice?" Dee swerved around a red minivan proclaiming 'Soccer mom to five.'

"About a week ago. Tex said –"

"Get down!" Alex hung out his window and fired as the van swerved into view.

Jenny pulled Jimmy's thick blanket over her and her son.

The back passenger side window shattered, showering the empty seat next to Jenny and the blanket.

"Where's a rocket launcher when you need one!" Jenny shook the glass into the empty seat then quickly checked Jimmy. Unhurt.

"Under the backseat." Dee skidded in between an ice cream truck and a delivery truck.

Jenny grabbed the 'Oh ****' bar above her head.

"Get the **** down! You're the target." Alex quickly reloaded. He refused the extra gun shoved into his face. "Jenny, keep it."

"Seriously, it's there." Dee saw a small opening in the traffic and stomped on the gas.

Alex ducked inside as the van sideswiped a gray sedan, sending it into fire hydrant. Water gushed everywhere.

Dee swerved to the right as a big rig truck stopped several hundred yards in front of them.

Jenny pushed Jimmy's head to stop his head from lolling to the right side. "Where's the van?"

"They're stuck behind the truck." Dee eyed another opening ahead of them.

"Your driving is horrible." Jenny checked on Jimmy. "Still asleep."

"Horrible for normal driving. Excellent for tactical driving." She cut across the intersection through the red light.

"Alex take over." Jenny swore she lost ten years of her life as a school bus skidded almost into her.

"Her ratings are higher. That's why she's the main driving instructor and I'm her backup." He scanned around. Safe for the moment.

"I think I lost them." Dee slightly relaxed as they reached the edge of the town.

Jenny stared at the next sign in horror. "Turn right now!" She covered Jimmy with her upper body.

The warning was too late as a brown van rammed into Dee's side pushing them into the guardrail. Alex grabbed Dee's right hand as they flipped over several times.

The van backed up then went the opposite direction. Mission accomplished.

Alex woke up to the acrid smell of gasoline. "Tex, come in!"

He looked to the driver's side and saw Dee unconscious, her limp arms near her head. "Send two buses now!"

"Where's our backup?" He touched his head and felt the slick wetness going down the right side of his face. "Going south on Sarah's Pathway. We went over the guardrail. They came out of nowhere. We're upside down."

"Alex… the babies… the babies…," mumbled Dee then fell silent.

"Shhh… honey, we're okay." He checked her pulse. "Weak pulse. She's out. She hit the steering wheel."

Alex released his seatbelt after bracing himself. "I'm bleeding…" He grunted as his head hit the edge of the seat head restraint. "… My head… don't know how bad. Jenny and Jimmy are out… hurry…"

He looked outside and listened. "Quiet. We weren't tailed for miles."

The urgency and the authority in his voice woke Alex up and he pushed through the pain. "**** no! Dee first."

Alex kicked the window out and crawled outside, sustaining gashes on his chest and arms. He didn't feel the pain – only the anger. "I'm thinking. **** you commanding officer."

He continued scanning the area. Quiet. Tex's next words stopped him dead. "Mission objective: Keep the targets Jenny and Jimmy safe and get them to the safehouse. Fine. I promise I'll tell Dee I got her out first, but if anything happens to any of them…."

Thankfully, the passenger window was already shattered and Jenny had picked the other side. "Jenny, I'm getting Jimmy first then I'll be right back for you."

He gently checked Jimmy. "He's breathing. Strong pulse. The seat held."

He released him then ran twenty feet away toward some brush. An upward thanks for thick foliage and trees to camouflage them from the roadway above.

After he put him on the ground, he checked him again "Jimmy's safe. I'm going back for Jenny."

He covered his mouth as ran through the stench of gasoline. He jumped over a fallen log.

Alex reached inside, trying to open the door on her side. "Jenny, wake up! Jenny!"

He looked at Dee willing her to wake up, to talk, to move. Something to give him hope.

Alex kicked the door, but it didn't budge. He grabbed the blanket near Dee's window and threw it across Jenny's face. Covering his face with his right arm, he smashed the window with his gun.

"Jenny! Wake up! Jenny!" He quickly assessed her condition.

"She's alive… strong pulse… can't wake her." He quickly freed her and sprinted to Jimmy.

"Helps how far?" He almost tripped over a branch. He caught himself by grabbing onto a bush, inhaling the noxious mix.

"Sweetheart, I'm here!" He checked her over. "Please wake up for me. Honey, please. Weak pulse. Shallow breathing."

Alex released her then ran for their lives. "I love you Dee."

The truck exploded.

Six weeks later…

Serenity Forest Cemetery

4:25 PM

Silent sentries flanked them. A hodgepodge of angels, cherubs, and imposing black gravestones stood beside them to bear witness on this breezy day.

"It's so peaceful here," she said as she traced the angel, its outstretched wings and hands below their names, cradling them in its embrace.

Dee wiped her tears as she traced 'Baby Girl and Baby Boy.' "We never even had a chance to name them, Alex."

She felt his hands on her shoulders. "You were in a coma for a month and I didn't know…"

Feeling him shudder, she placed her right hand on his. "It's okay honey, we didn't pick their names yet."

"It's not ****ing okay!" He lifted his hands off her.

She missed his warmth as he stepped away. "You got us all out. It's not your fault Jenny and Jimmy got ambushed later on that night."

"No way in hell was I going to leave your side. **** Tex's orders and threats to get them to another safehouse."

She looked over her shoulder. "It's not your fault."

Alex scanned the line of trees in front of them then bored into her eyes. "You are not leaving my sight. You're too damn weak to protect yourself."

"No. We protect each other." She turned back to the placard, brushing away the leaves. "We sure as hell couldn't protect our children."

She placed her hands under the inscriptions. "This can't be real."

She shook her head. More tears fell. "Alex, tell me how this could have happened. The truck was clean. No one knew our route not even Tex. Can't remember anything after we hit the guardrail."

He knelt beside her, his arm wrapped around her waist. "I didn't see them either until it was too late. I grabbed your hand as we went over. Look at me, sweetheart, please."

She turned to her left, her eyes pled for the truth.

"I woke up and got you out first then Jimmy then Jenny. You were all out. Our little girl… didn't suffer… died right after impact." He wiped her tears. "Our son fought… we lost him… when you went into cardiac arrest on the operating table… I almost lost you again. I can't do this again."

She looked down then placed her forehead above the angel's head. She cried for her children, for Jimmy, for Jenny, for all of them.

She would never hold her babies. Never see them. Never watch them grow up.

She was barren. Two hearts lost. Alone in her body.

More ghosts to haunt her. More nightmares to endure. More tears for shattered dreams.

Feeling him shift, she looked to her left. "Alex, I'm tired of crying."

He just nodded, staring unseeing at the placard.

She wiped his tears. "I want to try again when we're ready."

"You want more children?" His eyes shot to hers. "Even after we lost them?"

"I want to hold our child… to be a mother… for you to be a father." She put her hand on his heart. "Our dream… our family."

"But--"

She shook her head. "We are going to have a family. They will always live in our hearts. Never forgotten."

Placing his hand over hers, he said, "You never got to see them like I did." He looked down as his other hand rubbed across the inscriptions. "I prayed you'd wake up so you could be here."

As he helped her up, she looked to her right. "Mac, thank you for staying with me… for relieving Alex so he could bury our children."

Mac checked his watch. "He tell you that I punched him out so he'd get some rest?"

Alex let her go. "No. I fell asleep and hit the floor."

She looked from one to another and decided to let the matter drop.

"Mac, I want your promise. If anything happens to me, you back up Alex. Make sure he finds someone that makes him happy… to grow old… to have a family."

"Not without you, Dee."

She glared at Alex. "I promised you the same. You can't say no."

"I promise you I'll do as you ask."

She slapped Mac across the cheek. "That's for never forgetting."

Before he could react, she kissed him on the same cheek, murmuring "Thank you."

She stepped back into Alex's warm embrace, a warm smile reaching into her eyes.

"You can thank me for breaking her out of punching." Alex's rested his chin on her head as he held her close. "Took me two years."

"She's never punched me." Mac's eyes twinkled. "She telegraphs those."

She turned in his arms to face him. "Well… I was younger --"

"Easier to read and…"

Her withering glance silenced Mac before she turned back to Alex. "You know I had anger problems after Mac left and I still do… I'm sorry I did that to -- "

His finger on her lips silenced her. "It's a joke and I'm sorry to bring it up." He lowered his hand. "You are better."

He laid his forehead on hers. "We're better together."

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Mac leaving.

Without breaking contact, she said, "Hey, let's go back to our house and talk."

He stopped as he shoved his hands into his pockets. "Got something to do."

She felt Alex nodding then broke contact.

The cool breeze took away Alex's warmth. Wrapping her arms around her waist, she walked toward Mac.

"Trying to save the world again?"

"Something like that."

She stood in front of him. "Then be safe and come back. We still need to talk."

Over her shoulder, he saw Alex nodding. "I promise, but I don't know when."

Pulling her into an embrace, he whispered, "Call any time you need me… like you did."

She hugged him, tears running down her face. "Thank you for being there for me… for Alex… our babies."

He pulled her away, wiping her tears. "Hey… no more tears unless they're happy ones. You're alive. Alex is alive. You're both going to be great parents."

He nodded to Alex. "He's waiting for you. Go. I'll be back."

"Promise?"

He stepped away when Alex was behind her.

"I promise." He pinned Alex with his gaze. "Take care of her."

"You better come back or we'll hunt you down then she'll kick your ass."

Smiling, he replied enthusiastically, "Yes sir."

Mac walked away savoring this Kodak moment.

She twined her hands with his. "I chose you Alex. Never forget."

He kissed their wedding bands. "Together forever and more, my dear."

That last line is ****ing cold blooded. LMFAO

This was Da Bomb! Thanks for whipping your muse until it happened.

Thanks. I was laughing when I wrote that line.

you could totally get a job on lost! you have these massive epics in your head and dole them out for us one awesome piece at a time.

Thanks. I do write a lot of flashbacks in my stories, but I don't think I could write that much without a lot of filler. A friend of mine asked me about the series I'm writing if it were made, would it be movies or tv series. I told him movies. Too much filler if I wanted to do it like 24.

BTW, if the story sounds vaguely familiar... Zero Hour

Wow. I really like this.

All I could see was the wall and the wall felt me with its appendage. All I could feel was the cane pointed into the jungle of my mind.

You really got me because this is exactly how I feel when I go to the Chrylser museum. I'll spend hours just go through the exhibits. My favorites are the paintings. I just get lost in them.

"My name is insanity, and I am you"

That sent shivers down my spine. Thanks for posting!

When you started out I was remembering Thoreau's Walden which is good and bad. Bad because I hated this in high school. Good because I was only one of four to get an A that quarter on a research paper that almost killed me... "The use of Allusions in Henry David Thoreau's Walden." Lucky that I found an annotated version in my school library. I still can't pick up that book.

OMG! I laughed the entire time. Thank you.

Reminds me of Mulder and Scully arguing in Bad Blood.

SCULLY: Well, I can neither confirm nor deny agent Mulder's version of events which occurred outside my presence. MULDER: And I can neither confirm nor deny agent Scully's version of events, but, um...

 

SCULLY: Anyway... I was drugged.

 

MULDER: That is ... essentially, exactly the way it happened.

 

SCULLY: Essentially.

 

[Fade to black]

 

MULDER VOICE OVER: Except for the part about the buck teeth.

 

"White cane against my chair," I shot back, "wide sunglasses, haven't looked your way since you entered ... what was your first friggin' clue, genius?"

 

"You can't play the blind card on me, lady. Being dead trumps being blind. Cry me a river."

Gotta be the best lines. Any chance we'll get more of Raymond's story? Please.

I knew this was going to end badly! Good job, I like it.

 

As an aside, I could never eat in the dark. I have a strong phobia about bugs in my food so I just could never do it.

Awww, but if you've been reading the contests entries, you already know how it turns out. B-)

I can't do the dark either. I want to see what I'm eating.

"This is delicious," she said pushing away her plate. "The shrimp scampi over fettuccine's to die for. "

"A little messy and as fabulous as you, Josie, my dear. " He pulled her hands over the table.

"Daniel, I've had a wonderful evening. Only us here. "

"Except for that stupid thorn on that red rose. I hate that drop of blood marring your skin. "

"Honest mistake. " She felt his tension. "Why are we eating in complete darkness?"

"It heightens the other senses--makes food taste better," he replied, rubbing circles just below her wrists. "No preconceptions."

"What's wrong?"

"That Hemingway exhibit coming next year... I won't see it with you. "

"Business again? Postpone it. It's the first edition True at First Light."

"This is what I'll see. "

"How long have you known?"

"Right before I met you. " He let her go. "This is my future... our future if..."

"I don't care. I love you, Daniel."

The lights came on revealing her favorite Italian restaurant.

Her eyes blinked taking snapshots. Red rose dead center between them. Half full Merlot wineglasses. Remains of their Caesar salads and their empty entree plates.

The final snapshot-- Daniel on his knees next to her.

"Josephine, will you marry me?" He presented her with a platinum diamond solitaire ring cushioned in a red box.

"In sickness and health. Daniel, forever yes and more." She blinked back tears.

He held the ring before her.

"Josephine and Daniel together forever and more," she read.

He slid the ring onto her finger. "I want this burned into my memory. "

"Can't waste any more time." She pulled him up as his smile broke across his face.

Outside, they pulled on their sunglasses as a unit. Arm in arm they crossed in front of the restaurant.

Daniel looked left then shoved her away.

"Daniel!" She fell to her knees as he hit the SUV's windshield then flew over the passenger's side.

The SUV never stopped, taking a right on two tires.

She rushed to his side and cradled his bleeding head.

"What does your heart tell you?" he chocked out.

"The same as yours... I love you forever. " She kissed his forehead.

Daniel's wedding present-- his funeral.

Modern Day Muse has been posted.

Thanks for the extension, SD. BTW, I was thinking of the Horse-hating, Randy's baby Mama, crispy inviso-clothed, c6-raise the roof, Grimace frying, Easy Baking Oven lover, One shot through the head collateral damage falling over the bridge, Roman-hating, Lore-hating, wetsuit Bond girl, colorblind faker, MacGyvering scientist, hanging by the tips of her fingers on the cliffs of sanity, female Jack Bauer, resurrection scroll seeking, sliding blond Logan St. Clair, but there's no way I couldn't write her in 250 words.

Her fiery hair would be a silken curtain against the world as it draped over us. I grabbed at my ribs as I played with the elastic that held her hair. Broken ribs the price for seeing her hair free.

She was not too big nor too small. Curvy in all the right places. She'd fit perfectly in my hands. I'd drive her wild with pleasure.

My hands spanned her waist easily. Her hips told me she didn't have a child. Mine would definitely be preferable. I can't wait to see her defiant chin on our little boy or girl.

She wasn't even winded after running after me. A toned body with those sexy long legs.

Those eyes belonged to someone so much older than her looks -- seen too much. I can make her forget that past.

Those kissable lips formed a small pout. I knew exactly how to get rid of that.

The muzzle flash formed a halo around her, illuminating her against the darkness. Her hair freely waving in the wind.

"Death's angel beau…" I wheezed as my heart beat a final time.

I'm going to try to get this before midnight tonight. Gotta go to work. Grrr... gonna miss my Jack.

What about the next contest being a character description dealio? People have to describe the most interesting character they can in a hundred words or less and at the end we vote on the best and most interesting and most amusing character description. What do you think? Also, any other contest ideas?

Funny how a character jumped to the forefront of my mind within minutes of reading this. I like this idea.

With March coming up, I was looking at a sequel of the March Mini's thing we did last year.

 

This time around it would again be a number of short submissions - maybe with a common framework of a story already in place - written in different people's styles. It was complicated. Plus it leaves out anyone not already familiar with what has been written in the past.

 

So that's the rub. But the character description thing is interesting too.

I liked doing the March Minis. It was fun and I it helped with Script Frenzy last April.

But that's why it would have been so misleading, if you could have written a paragraph or two outside of your normal zone

The muse put a gun to my head so I follow her lead otherwise she'll disappear for close to a year. That happened a few years back and I still can't finish that story. Doesn't matter that I have all the notes, outlines and input from my beta readers. If the muse doesn't like it, I'll be blocked.

Considering how much work GLB puts into her normal writing, I imagine she'd die of sleep deprivation if she tried to world build.

You know me well, grasshopper. It's bad enough when the same scene runs through my mind for days at a time until I write it down. If I try to do a lot of world building, I'll never get to sleep.

BTW my entry was a gimme because I suck at guessing. SD totally could have wrote it. I'll have to think of something for the next part of that one.

 

You could have totally had us all in the dark if only you'd written about sparkly vampires or something. LMFAO

In the years you've known me, have you ever read anything of mine that had vamps or other supernatural creatures? I'm not talking about androids and such. That's right. I haven't. I leave the supernatural to those who can write it better. I suck at worldbuilding and that would be too much work to work on the mythology of said creature.

That character and scenario popped into my mind five minutes after I read Antilla's email requesting a writing sample. She was so forceful and wanted it exactly as such. After visualizing the scene for a day, I wrote it the next day, revising it three times to fit her attitude.

Congrats Copper.

I'll comment more in the next day or two. It's too damn cold in this room.

BTW Antilla, I'm about 10 minutes away west of the Atlantic Ocean in Virginia Beach. Those snowy pictures from the beach. We got about 10 inches here closing everything down. We haven't gotten that much snow in more than 10 years so everything closes down. We got hit again with a couple inches Saturday and might get more tomorrow. I got nothing to complain about since my brother's up near DC and he got more than 2 feet and going to get more.

SD, yesterday I was going to type up something on how I got my idea for my entry, but the Super Bowl got in the way. It's pretty funny with Mike, Fi and Sam helping me out.

BTW my entry was a gimme because I suck at guessing. SD totally could have wrote it. I'll have to think of something for the next part of that one.

Sonny, you really threw me with this one. I was 99.99% sure it was SD because you used the same phrases he would have. That Witchblade reference got me to vote for him because he mentioned it in the Burn Notice thread.

Well done! Gonna write some more?